Tag Archives: Sharon Schweitzer

Politics

How to Engage In Or Avoid A Political Conversation

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So how do you respond when someone brings you into the conversation?  How do you answer when they ask you for your opinion or who you’re going to vote for?

You could always just doodle on a receipt like this one from J. Barker :)
You could always just doodle on a receipt like this one from J. Barker 🙂

Sharon Schweitzer, an international etiquette expert, author and founder of Protocol & Etiquette Worldwide, says you have options.

Has politics become a reality TV show? Tonight's debate is being called the "Lisa Simpson versus Bart Simpson" debate.
Has politics become a reality TV show? 
  1. You don’t want to respond

Keeping your opinion to yourself can be difficult; however, it is possible. Say something like, “In the midst of such a contentious political season, I feel it’s best to keep my opinion to myself. I do appreciate your interest and wish you the best in your political decisions.”

By acknowledging and thanking them for their genuine interest, you are able to get out of sticky political conversations but retain your well-mannered and ever sophisticated demeanor.

  1. If they push again

If they keep pushing for a response, you can play the undecided card and change the subject.

“I’m still evaluating the candidates and the issues and haven’t made up my mind yet.  It will be interesting to see how it plays out.”

To get them off the topic for good, ask them about something meaningful to them that they will want to talk about.  “I hear your son got accepted to Ohio State. Congratulations!”  “Great job on closing that account.  How did you do it?”  “Tell me about your trip to the mountains a few weeks ago. I hear it is beautiful this time of year.”

  1. You want to respond

If you would like to express your beliefs, the best way to do so is to cite research and concrete reasons why your views align a certain way, as this will encourage more of an intellectual conversation than a possible war of opinions.  Just as you want to express your beliefs, be courteous and let the person you are speaking to express his or her beliefs, even if you disagree.

  1. If you disagree

It’s inevitable that disagreements will arise, but when they do, handle them with grace, dignity and respect. Say something like, “That’s an interesting way to look at it and you bring up some valid points; however, I feel that…” Never raise your voice, show anger, abruptly walk away or make it personal.

  1. Either way

Whether you decide to respond or not, be tactful, polite, and remember that educated responses will help you either to cordially engage, or graciously decline whenever these inevitable conversations cross your path. For the Silo, Alex Smith.

Culture

Christmas Holiday Tipping: Who Do I Tip And How Much?

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There’s the mailman, mail woman and the doorman, door woman,  the pet sitter and personal trainer, not to forget the housekeeper, home healthcare worker and many others.  So just who do you tip this holiday season and how much?

Sharon Schweitzer, an international etiquette expert, author, and the founder of Protocol & Etiquette Worldwide, offers this simple tipping checklist of which service providers you need to tip this holiday season and how much:

Business (check corporate policy):

  • Clients: Business gift baskets of chocolate, edible fruit, nuts, cheese, wine, cookies, petite fours; golf balls & non-logo gifts.
  • CEO/Boss: Group gift to their favorite charity or non-profit foundation
  • Assistant: Bonus or gift based on relationship length
  • Colleagues: gift they will like for sports, hobby, or dining, gift card.
  • Office Gift Exchange: don’t go rogue, follow the spending guidelines.
cheap tip

Education & Schools (follow policy):

  • Professor: greeting card, no gift
  • Teacher: Consider a group gift with parents pooled funds
  • Assistant /Aide: $25 – $50 gift certificate
  • Multiple Teachers: small gift, candle, baked goods, gift certificate.
  • Principle: Holiday card & baked goods
  • School Secretary: café gift card, small gift or gift certificate
  • School Nurse: café gift card, small gift or gift certificate

Home or Building Personnel:

  • Live-in help (cook or butler): between a week-month’s pay, plus a gift
  • Housekeeper: if they come once a week: equivalent of a day’s pay, or $50. If they come daily: equivalent of a week’s pay, and possibly a gift
  • Gardener: equivalent of a week’s service
  • Landscaping crew: equivalent of a week’s service, divided among the crew
  • Pool cleaning crew: equivalent of one session, divided among the crew.
  • Garage attendant: between $15 and $40 or give a small gift
  • Garbage/recycling: if city permits, $10-$30 each for extra holiday effort
  • Doorman: between $50 – $100 each, or gift, depending on extra duties
  • Elevator Operator and Handyman: between $20 – $50 each
  • Newspaper delivery: between $10 – $35, or give a small gift

Healthcare providers:

  • Private health care nurse: week’s pay or a gift of similar value
  • Home health employee: follow policy / generous gift basket of holiday treats
  • Nursing home staff: follow policy / gift basket of holiday treats for all

Personal grooming:

  • Hairstylist, manicure, pedicure, specialist: equivalent of a visit
  • Barber: haircut & shave equivalent or give a gift
  • Massage therapist/personal trainer: session equivalent or give a gift

Pet care:

  • Groomer: equivalent of one session or give a gift
  • Walker: week’s pay equivalent or “1-2 visits” per com
  • Sitter: a week’s pay and a paw print note from your pet

Package & Mail Delivery:

The United States Postal Service provides the public with a tipping and gift receiving policy on their website, FedEx and UPS do not. The information provided for FedEx and UPS is from customer service representatives who preferred not to give their names.

United States/Canada Postal Service:

  • Employees may accept baked goods (homemade/store bought) items to share with the branch office. Customers may give edible arrangements, gift cards for merchandise or services valued up to $20 per interaction. Gifts cannot exceed $50 per calendar year.
  • Gifting cash, VISA, MasterCard, or gift cards that may be used as cash are prohibited per USPS Employee Tipping and Gift Receiving Policy and also prohibited for Canada Post employees.

FedEx:

  • Company policies discourage gift cash or gift cards. The driver will politely decline the holiday gratuity. If the customer is insistent, the driver may ultimately accept the gift.

UPS

  • UPS does not have a limit; tipping is left to customer’s discretion.

Avoid giving holiday tips to people on this list; send holiday e-cards instead:

Accountant/CPA

Attorney

Auditor

Banker

Bookkeeper

Dentist

Doctor

Executive Coach

Members, Board of Directors or Trustees

Seamstress/ Tailor

Veterinarian

Politics

Do’s And Don’ts Of Political Conversations

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We live in one of the most politically heated times in history. Expressing your point of view is a personal decision and can be tricky.  Although conversations may start out benign, they can quickly become a toxic dialogue.

Sharon Schweitzer, an international etiquette expert, author, and the founder of Access to Culture, says there are several “do’s and dont’s” to make sure polite political discourse doesn’t turn into hostile debates.

DO   

Show respect for differing opinions

It can be challenging to listen to those with different opinions. It’s important to show respect and take time to listen, giving the other person the opportunity to share their viewpoints. The Platinum rule encourages treating others as they wish to be treated. Stay calm, collected and respectful.

Agree to disagree

If their opinions are different from your views, you can agree to disagree. Try saying something along the lines of, “I respect your perspective, but I think we may need to agree to disagree” or “That’s a different way of thinking about the issue, but I’m comfortable if you and I can agree to disagree.”

Ask questions

If someone asks you a question about your political beliefs, you can reciprocate by asking them about their own beliefs. Let the other person do the talking while you listen. Try to ask open-ended questions such as, “What are your thoughts on the current political atmosphere?” or “How do you feel about the media’s portrayal of …?”

Change the subject

  • If someone continues to ask your opinion, change the topic by saying: “It’s impossible to keep track of the different versions of the news. How is your family doing by the way?” “With the divisive political atmosphere, I’m not comfortable sharing my personal opinions, but thank you for your interest.” “I can’t answer that question, but what I can discuss is… ”

DON’T

Get angry, cross or upset

It can be difficult to keep your temper, but don’t get angry or upset if you don’t agree with someone’s viewpoints. Expressing sarcasm, bitterness or passive aggressiveness won’t change any minds. It will only damage your reputation.

Talk over them

The worst thing you could do is interrupt conversation and start talking about your own opinion. Be respectful of other opinions and views. Listen attentively, especially when you don’t agree with that viewpoint. It gets easier the more you practice.

Overshare

Politics is a difficult conversation, particularly with family members and close friends. If you are speaking to someone you’ve just met, refrain from oversharing. In this case, less is more. Avoid saying something you will later regret.

Make assumptions

We make mental notes when we first meet someone new. We make a first impression based on hair, shoes, watch, clothing, mannerisms, etc. However, political views are hidden unless they are shared verbally or by wearing a revealing detail.  It’s important to approach people with an open mind to avoid awkward and potentially toxic conversations.

For the Silo, Scott Jones.

Featured image- http://ashleylewis-oldmeetsnew.blogspot.ca/

Culture

International Etiquette Expert, Sharon Schweitzer Shares Father’s Day Ideas

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Without him, you would not have known how to change a flat tire, nor the difference between a socket wrench and a ratchet wrench. His insights on sports led you to your favorite team. He’s always been there with a helping hand and now with the approach of Father’s Day on Sunday, June 19th, take the time to give back to him.  What’s the best way to do that? Here’s the “etiquette skinny!”

"The best Evil Son" ;)

Author Sharon Schweitzer
Author Sharon Schweitzer

Sharon Schweitzer, an international etiquette expert, author and founder of Protocol & Etiquette Worldwide, says stay ahead of the curve, mail those cards and plan now. Spoil the amazing man that has guided you through your life.

Sharon’s tips:

  • Plan a Memory: Father’s Day is a time to set aside everything else and devote the day to your dear dad. If you are not a golfer but your dad is, take some time to share his favorite pastime. Go on a hike, a brewery tour, concert, camping trip or lunch at his favorite restaurant. Celebrate everything your dad has taught you, and also create something new and memorable with him on this very special day.
  • Share the Day: Sometimes we need to share Father’s Day with Dad and also brothers, uncles, godfathers, grandfathers, stepfathers and others.  Host a celebration for your loved ones for maximum time with your favorite people. Mother’s Day is famous for brunch. On Father’s day host a BBQ, cookout or inclusive celebration.
  • Remember Father Figures: For some, Father’s Day is difficult as fathers have passed or may have been absent. Consider using this time as an opportunity to show appreciation for the male mentors in your life. A father figure is more than biological, and can be a role model, leader or inspirational man who helped shape your world.
  • Share Your Time & Express Gratitude: A national survey of the average North American’s major life regrets highlighted that one of the biggest regrets is not spending more time with parents. Use this day to express how much your father has meant to you over the years. Communicate your gratitude, care and love during this time with him.

    Dr Evil and Scotty Evil.
    Dr Evil and Scotty Evil.
  • Gift-Giving: Gifts for dads can range greatly depending on your father’s interests. Consider the three P’s to guide your gift giving: Practical, Personalized, and Perfect.
  • Practical Gifts: Is he practical? Go for the gift that won’t get tossed in a closet or re-gifted. Talk to your dad about his needs or communicate with family members. Contribute toward a group gift he will truly love, for example: Business and casual clothing, restaurant gift certificates to his favorite place and hobby accessories (paints and art supplies, how-to books).
  • Personalized Gifts: Go the extra mile to highlight his name, family crest or favorite team.  For example: An engraved Watch, personalized beer growler, glassware or flask and sports team wine stoppers.
  • Perfect Gifts: Find the gift that quintessentially represents your dad or his future goals. Where does he want to go? What’s on his list? A perfect gift for your father: New sports equipment like a golf club, fishing rod, or tennis racket; a fly-fishing or deep-sea trip he wants; or concert tickets to his favorite band.

As part of your Father’s Day, please consider these tips from Sharon. For the Silo, Bruce Serbin.