Tag Archives: psychology

Thanksgiving’s Underlying Message Of Gratitude Helps Willpower Around Food

October 6, 2023 The Silo 1 Comment

As millions upon millions of Canadians and Americans look ahead to Thanksgiving with trepidation about overeating, Susan Peirce Thompson, Ph.D., a brain and cognitive scientist specializing in the psychology of eating, offers this timeless wisdom:

Thanksgiving, with its underlying message of gratitude, can help, not hinder, willpower around food.

In fact, says Susan — who is President of the Institute for Sustainable Weight Loss author of the forthcoming book, Bright Line Eating: The Science of Living Happy, Thin and Free (Hay House, March 2017) — when incorporated into the scaffolding of your life, giving thanks before EVERY meal has immeasurable health and weight control benefits, for the following reasons:

It reinforces the routine of eating meals on a regular schedule

Eating regular meals at consistent times is crucial in that it lengthens the body’s fasting window, which increases fat loss and strengthens the process by which cells recycle and repair. It also improves insulin sensitivity and lowers cholesterol.

It takes the burden off willpower

Willpower depletion is a very real phenomenon. In fact, research shows we may have as little as 15 minutes of willpower at our disposal before it runs dry. However, research also shows that something as simple as making a gratitude list can replenish its stores. Hence, practicing an “attitude of gratitude” is one of the best ways to harness the brain’s ability to resist unwanted and unneeded extra food.

Turning thoughts toward gratitude eases temptations themselves

No matter where you are in the world, no matter what party or occasion, no matter what restaurant, you can always turn your mind toward gratitude. Doing so shifts the focus from what you want, or crave, to what you have. It also supports mindfulness, helping sharpen awareness of your actions and lead to better choices.

Supplemental- From paleoholic.com …..Why your diet failed you.

Culture

Through Balance Everyone Has Potential To Shine

January 30, 2023 The Silo 4 Comments

Life sometimes can seem off kilter as responsibilities mount and people plow all their physical and mental resources into what seems to be the most pressing crisis of the moment.

But Lumbie Mlambo says that’s a good time to take a step back. Everyone has the potential to shine in life’s darkest moments, but the key to achieving goals and an overall better existence is to maintain a balance so that one aspect of your life isn’t consumed by another.

While some people might say balance in life is an impossible goal, she disagrees and says when each of us find our equilibrium, we become more productive and a greater asset to our communities.

“There’s balance in everything we do, be it walking, talking, eating, sleeping, working or spending time with family,” says Mlambo, editor of Equanimity Magazine, an online publication that features inspiring stories of life and success.

“For example, look at how we try to deal with our work-life situation. We balance our workload so that we can still make room for other activities, to spend more time with our spouses or our children. We do that because we understand how important it is.”

She offers these reasons for why living a balanced life is essential.

• The health factor. Staying balanced is a key to a healthier and successful life. Both mental health and physical health benefit, and as a result, so do our overall lives. “When we’re healthy, we’re able to care for ourselves and others in our community,” Mlambo says.

• The empathy factor. When we find balance in life, we can better understand the importance of helping the underprivileged, says Mlambo, who grew up in a rural area in Zimbabwe. You begin to realize that someday you could be in their situation, which makes you a more empathetic person. “Your economic situation is like your health,” she says. “Nothing is guaranteed.”

• The role-model factor. Sharing our stories – whether it’s a tale of success or even a tale of failure – is important because others can learn from us or be inspired by us as they too strive for a balanced life. “When you tell your story, it empowers, motivates and encourages people to not give up on their dreams and goals,” Mlambo says. “Maybe you think your story is just not that interesting or important. But for someone out there, it may be the spark that ignites them to great things.”

Mlambo always strove to find balance in her life. But she became even more passionate about it after she suffered a stroke in 2001 that left her partially paralyzed. She since has recovered, but says the event had a profound impact on her and she will always consider herself a stroke patient.

“Before the stroke, I thought my life was balanced in a way,” she says. “I mean, I ate healthy foods. I exercised seven days a week. But it was not balanced in the way I wanted. I had been too focused on myself. I realized that life was not just about me, but about others.”

Finding balance in life isn’t just a feel-good concept, Mlambo says. As people achieve balance, they realize they have the potential to rise above their circumstances. They can become more productive in their communities and that is good for everyone.

“Staying proactive and shifting the way we think can even help the economy to grow and can help create more jobs,” she says.

Certainly, maintaining a balanced life may be tougher than ever because technology allows work – emails, text messages, telephone calls – to intrude on people’s “off” hours. But that’s just all the more reason to make a concerted effort to strive for balance, Mlambo says.

She says it’s become popular in some circles to argue that a balanced life is a myth and can’t be achieved. But regardless of their views, she says, most people seem to be trying to bring balance to their lives, even if they don’t think of it that way.

“We eat healthy to stay balanced, we get enough sleep or rest to avoid stress, we juggle our daily activities to stay balanced,” Mlambo says. “To be successful in anything we do, we must have some sort of balance.” For the Silo, Lumbie Mlambo.

Culture

Working On Emotional Intelligence Will Open Doors To Achievement

December 16, 2022 The Silo 1 Comment

Personal power is a core leadership competency that everyone needs to develop before they can lead others. It has to do with being able to
lead yourself.

“Personal power is the ability to achieve what you want,” according to Frederick Mann, a successful entrepreneur and author of The Economic Rape of America.

“More than anything else, it is personal power that brings you success and happiness. The biggest barrier to success in almost
any endeavor is powerlessness, negativity, helplessness, and inertia. They belong together. The problem is not only our own powerlessness, but also the powerlessness of those around us.”

We can help harness and learn to use our personal power by understanding and working on our Emotional Intelligence (EI) skills.

Not long ago, when I worked in a corporate environment, there was a strong push to incorporate EI into the organization’s leadership
training curriculum as an array of skills and characteristics that drive leadership performance.

EI is “the ability to monitor one’s own and others’ feelings and emotions, to discriminate among them and to use this information to guide
one’s thinking and actions,” according to psychologists John D. Mayer and Peter Salovey, who co-developed the concept and were two of the three authors of the Emotional Intelligence Test.

a. Pay attention to the feedback of friends and co-workers, good and bad. Train yourself to repeat the behaviors that get positive feedback and work on eliminating those that make people react negatively.
b. View constructive criticism as just that. When we become defensive, we don’t hear what can be very helpful feedback.
c. Learn to handle conflict and confrontation from a perspective of compassion and caring.

Personal coaching can be very helpful in learning to be more diplomatic in your interactions with others.

Dr. Salovey (left) and Dr. Mayer (right)

My EI training and its practical applications to my work team environment still resonate in my personal life. They became skills that I now methodically apply to current situations in both personal and entrepreneurial pursuits.

There are several EI models, but the one to which I ascribe is the mixed model introduced by Daniel Goldman, a combination of ability and traits. Here are Goldman’s five main EI constructs, and my views on how each of us can develop them:

1. Self-awareness: the ability to know one’s emotions, strengths, weaknesses, drives, values and goals and recognize their impact on others while using gut feelings to guide decisions.

In order to become self-aware, you need to conduct an honest self-assessment to determine your strengths and weaknesses, such as powerlessness and inertia, and determine the root causes. You then need to create a plan that will help you overcome your fears, which are barriers to courage and stand between you and your successes.

While I am a big proponent of using my intuition to guide my decisions, whenever it is appropriate, I need to caution that unless your gut
feelings are often more right than wrong, you cannot make decisions solely based upon intuition. You need to use a balanced combination of intuition and logic.

2. Self-regulation: involves controlling or redirecting one’s disruptive emotions and impulses and adapting to changing circumstances.

Simply put, you need to exercise self-discipline and know how to control your emotions and be flexible in order to adapt to changing
situations. You cannot continue on the same trajectory or keep the same plans when the circumstances or facts have changed. Your plans need to be modified accordingly.

3. Social skills: managing relationships to move people in the desired direction.

Your social skills refer to your interpersonal skills or your ability to relate and connect with people, which can motivate them to deploy discretionary efforts to help you achieve goals that are best accomplished via partnership and collaboration.

Here are some tips for improving your social skills:

Personal coaching can be very helpful in learning to be more diplomatic in your interactions with others.

4. Empathy – considering other people’s feelings, especially when making decisions.

Some people believe empathy cannot be learned, but I believe just the opposite. Put yourself in the other person’s shoes and try to see
situations from their perspective. Might they be feeling fear? Shame? Guilt? How do those emotions make you feel? Understanding and addressing the concerns of others is essential to EI.

Always consider intent versus impact, and how your actions or decisions may affect the individuals or groups involved.

5. Motivation – being driven to achieve for the sake of achievement.

Simply put, what motivates you? What are your benchmarks for success? Once you achieve certain levels of success, you need to consistently
set new benchmarks to keep chasing personal excellence!

Practice your EI skills on yourself first, and you’ll develop greater personal power. That can lead to achievements you may never have dreamed possible. For the Silo, Lynda Chervil.

Lynda Chervil is the author of “Fool’s Return,” http://lyndachervil.com/, a new novel that incorporates valuable life lessons in a page-turning tale that touches on technology, the green movement, and other aspects of contemporary society.

Culture

Families That Fight Over Inheritance

August 9, 2022 The Silo 5 Comments

The recently deceased don’t always ingratiate themselves with their survivors when it comes time to read the will.

“People want to control things from the grave, not just throw a bunch of money in a beneficiary’s lap,” says family wealth guru John Pankauski, author of the new book, “Pankauski’s Trustee’s Guide: 10 Steps to Family Trustee Excellence.”

It’s their money so that’s their right.

But family members aren’t always crazy about how the deceased divided up the money or, if the inheritance was put into a trust, the restrictions that are placed on how the money is spent.

And often ill feelings among family members can bubble to the surface when money is at stake.

“I deal with sibling rivalries, petty jealousies and childhood grudges played out by adults who are decades older, but no more mature,” says Pankauski, founder of the Pankauski Law Firm (www.pankauskilawfirm.com), which specializes in trust and estate law. “It makes me think that part of my job is to be a wealth psychologist.”

Often, an inheritance isn’t doled out immediately. Instead, it’s placed in a trust with a trustee to oversee it, making decisions on when and how to distribute the money based on the terms of the trust.

In many situations, that works out fine. But in seriously dysfunctional families, that can make a bad situation borderline intolerable.

Pankauski says any number of factors can lead to family feuds or general disgruntlement over an inheritance. Here are just a few:

• Sense of entitlement. Many beneficiaries have a misplaced sense of entitlement to an inheritance. They just expect that mom or dad will leave them money or property. In their minds, it’s what they have coming to them. “The truth is, you can dispose of your property any way you want,” Pankauski says. “There is no right to an inheritance and just about anyone can be disinherited.”

So if people want to leave their money in a trust for a family pet, or bequeath everything to a neighbor, a mistress or a charity, they have every right to do so, assuming they are competent and know what they are doing. “It’s their money,” Pankauski says. “They can do with it as they wish.” Other than dealing with a spouse, there are almost no restrictions.

• The audacity of the trust. Family members often become frustrated and angry when they realize they inherited money, but it’s in a trust and there are strings attached. “The beneficiaries view trusts as handcuffs on their money,” Pankauski says. “A trust takes all those family members’ personal feelings and emotions, all that baggage, and adds money to create a financial stew into which the beneficiaries are thrown.”

Often, because beneficiaries don’t like it that a trustee gets to make decisions on when and how they get a portion of their inheritance, family members will seek counsel and try to “bust the trust.”

• An implied accusation of financial irresponsibility. At some point it may begin to dawn on beneficiaries that one reason the inheritance was placed in a trust is that the deceased didn’t view them as responsible with money. “That may seem insulting, but it doesn’t have to be,” Pankauski says. “Many would argue that most people are irresponsible with money, particularly a large sum of inherited money that appears out of the blue, much like winning a lottery.”
Sometimes at least a portion of the family animosity might be avoided by better planning when the will is being written and the trust created.
“When beneficiaries don’t get along,” Pankauski says, “it may make more sense to cut their financial ties by either creating multiple separate shares within the trust or creating separate trusts altogether.”

For the Silo, John Pankauski, LLP.

Culture

Creativity Espoused By Mainstream Media Is Sadly About Machine Creativity

May 26, 2022 The Silo Leave a comment

[You may know him from the movies “What The Bleep Do We Know” and “Down The Rabbit Hole” – Two great introductory documentaries on Quantum Physics you really owe it to yourself to see. Let the Silo introduce you to a welcomed, new contributor- Dr. Amit Goswami – Author, Speaker and Scientist. Ed.]

“I am very excited about one of my recent books- Quantum Creativity. The main message of this book is this: If you are interested in creativity and in thinking quantum, you have the basics of what it takes to be creative, in fact, to be extraordinary in your creativity.

Quantum physics is the physics of possibilities. Quantum physics says reality is both possibility and actuality.

The objects of the universe are possibilities, quantum possibilities; they become objects of actuality in our experience when we observe because we have chosen actuality from the possibilities proffered. This two-level complementary reality is an important aspect of our consciousness. The unmanifest, (psychologists call it the unconscious, spiritual traditions call it the transcendent) is the realm where consciousness processes possibilities (unconscious processing) but without awareness, without subject-object separation.

The manifest (psychologists call it the conscious, spiritual traditions call it the immanent) is the domain of actualities that consciousness processes with awareness, with subject-object split.

Quantum thinking consists of this two-level processing—both unconscious and conscious. Quantum thinking understood in this way liberates you, anyone, from any assumed ordinariness. With its help, anyone can be creative.

Creativity was difficult for people of the olden days because they had to pursue it blindly, they did not know how human creativity works; they assumed it is all mystery, all arts. And today, lots of people shortchange their creativity because of their faulty mechanistic worldview.

The truth is, we cannot discuss the relevant issues of human creativity without a lot of make-belief within our current mechanistic worldview based on the metaphysics of scientific materialism—everything is matter moving in space-time and material interaction.

The science of creativity that the protagonists of a mechanistic worldview talk about, and which today you read about in the media, is about machine creativity. To a large extent it is sophistry, about how determined machines can somehow appear to be creative.

It is self-evident that human creativity requires consciousness as a causal entity with free will, freedom to choose.

It is self-evident that human creativity requires the capacity to process meaning, that human creativity involves affects (agony and ecstasy), and that human creativity begins with intuition.

Dealing with human creativity requires a worldview in which consciousness is causally potent, in which not only our physical experiences but also our experiences of thinking, feeling and intuition are validated. Quantum physics, properly interpreted, gives us that worldview. Engaging the two level complementary reality of quantum physics gives human creativity all its wonderful and mysterious attributes that material machines moving in a one-level space-time reality cannot possibly simulate.” For the Silo, Dr. Amit Goswami.

Culture

Eight Ways To Make Time For Important Things

July 1, 2021 The Silo Leave a comment

One of the most common lines that people love to use: “I wish I had more time.” Maybe it’s more time to spend with family or friends; more time to exercise and eat healthy; or more time to go back to school. Whatever it is, how do you make more time for those truly important things in your life?

Dr. Alok Trivedi, author of Chasing Success, says the reality is we all have the same 24 hours. The difference is some people know how to better manage it than others. When it comes to making time for the important things, Dr. Trivedi recommends:

1. Minimize, minimize and minimize some more. There was a reason Marie Kondo’s novel about tidying up your space to become happy was so successful. There is truth in her message of eliminating the unnecessary and finding what you love in the process. Get rid of what does not bring you joy. This can be old items or even toxic relationships that no longer serve you. Less is really more.

2. Being busy does not bring you value. In North American culture, it can be all too easy to be running around completing task after task. Many people view this form of productivity as determining their worth in society. It’s wise to assess what in your life is bringing you value and maximize that rather than trying to do things that just don’t feel right and make you feel unworthy on the inside. Business is an excuse and distraction to overlook the things in which you may be afraid to focus your energy on.

3. Differentiate between efficiency and effectiveness. Your time is precious and needs to be allocated to the most important things. Utilize your time to be both effective and efficient. Being only effective can be a time-consuming action. While complementary, being only efficient can lead to sloppy results. When you are doing any task, approach it within a concept of both maximum efficiency and total effectiveness to reap the best results. In your personal life, this is achieved through being present and genuine in your interactions.

4. Single task and hold your focus. Many people find themselves casually checking a single email, and before long they snap into full-fledged work mode. Develop a schedule and follow it religiously. It may be hard to find your groove initially, but if you stick to it, little by little it will become a habit.

5. Know what you hold important. It is a challenge to know how to dedicate your free time if you haven’t discovered what you love. Find the activities where your creativity flows and your heart sings. Only in these states are you going to find yourself in the states of joy that make you feel life is worth living.

6. Address problems at the root. When you have the time to dedicate to the important things, you don’t want work problems to keep popping up. If there is a problem at work, address it from the start. Don’t keep putting it off, because it will fester at inopportune times. This goes both ways. If you have a personal dilemma with a family member, don’t run from it by adopting workaholic ways. Confront your problems head on to solve them with best results. Shying away will only allow the problem to become worse in the shadows.

7. Getting and staying organized. When it is time to be with friends and family the last thing you want to do is housework. Dedicate an initial cleaning and mass organization of your space. After this initial step, take a little time each day to clear your space and organize everything into its given area. The clarity of your physical space lends to clarity of mind. Then, there is mental space to focus on what matters, and not be distracted by the mess around you.

8. Block out time just for you. You must become your top priority. Declare certain times of the day and week that are just for you. This time can be for you to indulge in your favorite pastimes, meditate, or even to do nothing. This time is yours to center yourself and think about what you are presently encountering in life.

Live in every moment, and focus on the present. For the Silo, Alex Smith.

Culture

4 Aspects Of Your Life You Can Improve By Listening To Jazz

May 22, 2021 The Silo 3 Comments

Music is known to have a strong effect on most people. It can compel its listeners to move along its rhythm and dance. It can also provide stimulation to the brain, which can improve a person’s bodily performance.

This positive impact can double for the person performing the music. Can you image the impact that the more varied and dynamic genres of music, such as jazz, can have on you?

Jazz is not only a pleasure to listen to, but consuming it can bring about numerous improvements to your health and lifestyle. Whether you listen to this type of music in the background while working to attending dedicated worldwide jazz festivals, jazz can help improve your well being. Continue reading to learn more about how jazz can improve many aspects of your life.

Energy and Creativity

Completing daily tasks can sometimes get difficult. It can be easy for you to become bored and lose motivation or have your energy depleted due to repetition and tedium. Jazz can help you regain that focus and energy, making activities such as daily work and exercise feel easier than they are.

The unique, diverse rhythm provided by the music causes your brain to produce and release the appropriate chemicals. This is the brain attempting to match the music’s beats, and due to jazz’s improvisational nature, it keeps the brain’s stimulation high, making it easier to keep up with rigorous activities. Additionally, active, but ambient, noise increases processing difficulty, which encourages abstract thinking and creativity. More creative thinking can help you find work solutions and keep you engaged in the task at hand.

Blood Pressure

Is high blood pressure a recurring problem with you? Then music rich with rhythm, especially jazz, can help you out. Music has a dynamic relationship with people’s cardiovascular system that several researchers have investigated before. Jazz can help you decrease your blood pressure by impacting your blood vessels. Rhythmic, lively music like jazz can open your blood vessels to around 30% more than normal, reducing your pressure.

Further studies conducted by the Osaka University in Japan show that people who listen to music after three months have their blood pressure reduced by 6 mmHg. You can equate this decrease to people who have taken their blood pressure medication, lost 10 pounds, or adopted a low-sodium diet. This change can ultimately improve your overall health, as it decreases your chances of suffering from heart disease or a stroke.

Immune System

One of the most important systems in your body is the immune system. It is mainly composed of organs and white blood cells and it is your body’s ultimate line of defense against germs, infections, and diseases. While there are many healthy habits you can embrace to boost your immunity, such as regular exercise and a healthy diet, you can also add listening to jazz to the list.

Psychologist Carl Charnetski discovered in a study that people who listened to jazz for at least 30 minutes produced a higher level of immunoglobulin A (IgA) than other subjects. This chemical is one of the many antibodies created by the immune systems that manifests alongside the mucous linings of the body. Arrange for jazz listening sessions to keep a strong level of IgA going.

Stress Management

While it can be a cliché to say that jazz’s primary audience is “cool” people, there is some truth to that statement. According to the University of Nevada, music that goes up to 60 beats per minute can cause your brain to release alpha brainwaves. These waves are related to sleep and relaxation, calming your nerves and ironically making you more alert. Certain types of noise, such as smoother jazz, stringed instruments, and even rainfall, are more effective than others in winding you down after a busy day at work.

Jazz is not only one of the most dynamic music genres out there, but it can also make a positive impact on your health. From improving the body through the immune and cardiovascular systems to decreasing stress and encouraging energy, focus, and creativity, listening to jazz can bring noticeable changes to your well being. Consider these benefits the next time you choose the concerts to attend or the type of background music you will play while you work.

Culture

What Are Mind Control Religions?

May 18, 2021 The Silo 2 Comments

Is Tom Cruise the poster boy for alternative religion?

In most western-world countries, laws protect consumers from fraud and unethical business practices. But to date, there are no laws on the books that recognize destructive mind control, much less prohibit the use of it by cult-like groups of religion. However, if my colleague Steven Hassan, the pioneer of exit counseling for cult members and a critically acclaimed author, and thousands of other ex-cult members have any say about it, that may soon change.

The mind, despite all of its strengths, depends on a stream of coherent information for it to function properly. Put a person into an environment where the senses are overloaded with incoherent information and the mind becomes numb. In this confused state, critical thinking skills don’t work and the mind becomes suggestible to those who would replace an individual’s self-interest with the group’s best interests.

Everyone, like it or not, is vulnerable to mind control. Everyone is looking for something better in life: more happiness, more meaning and more security. Recruiters prey upon these basic human needs. People don’t join; they are recruited, and more often than not, during a stressful time in their lives.

Mind-control religions use our fantasies of an ideal world to draw us in. The “love bombing” and the sincere, committed members that newcomers initially encounter prove far more attractive and convincing than the doctrines.

Recruitment doesn’t just happen.

“It’s a process,” Hassan says, “imposed on people by other people.”

During that orientation process—it could be a seemingly innocuous six-month Bible study—irrational phobias are placed in the potential member’s unconscious mind. The first is that no one can really be happy and successful if they’re not a member of that particular religion.

After they become members, life is about sacrifice and living in a fantasy world created by the group. The need to live in the present is continually reinforced with warnings like “Armageddon is just around the corner,” giving members a sense of urgency about the tasks at hand. Those who begin to doubt will find leaving painful, as one of the penalties will be extreme shunning.

Children raised in these groups typically receive an inferior education, are taught that the world is an evil place controlled by the devil, and must rely on church leaders’ interpretation of reality.

Mind-control clichés like “we alone have the truth” or “all non-members will die at Armageddon” are continually reinforced, which puts up an invisible wall between believers and outsiders. This makes members feel special, believing they are counted among God’s chosen few.

Behavior control, Information control, Thought control and Emotional control (the BITE model) has great power and influence on the human mind. Together, these four control mechanisms are used by destructive religious groups to form a totalistic web, which can manipulate even the strongest-minded people. (Hassan provides a thorough explanation of how BITE works in his three best-selling books.) And if that’s not enough, mind-control religious members are required to proselytize; research in social psychology shows that nothing confirms one’s beliefs better than trying to sell those beliefs to other people.

Given freedom of choice, people will choose what they believe is best for themselves. However, the criteria for determining what is “best” should be one’s own, not someone elses.

Freedom of choice is the first thing that one loses when one becomes a member of groups like Scientologists, Moonies and Jehovah’s Witnesses. Unchecked, these groups will continue to wreak untold psychological and physical damage on millions of people who have no idea of what constitutes unethical mind control. Unless action is taken to make destructive religious groups accountable to society for their violations of the basic civil rights of their members, in particular the children of members, they will continue to deceive the public into believing they are a harmless group of people, deserving the same constitutional guarantees as benevolent religions.

Grant money for research projects and treatment of mind-control victims is needed now. Reform within public education must be made to encourage people to think for themselves, to understand the psychological principles of mind control and to teach students to be suspicious of any environment that discourages them from asking critical questions. If you would like to help, go to www.aawa.com and www.freedomofmind.com. For the Silo, Richard E. Kelly.

Culture

4 Ways To Fortify Your Marriage & Manage Your Differences

November 2, 2020 The Silo Leave a comment

Marriage is a complex, ever-evolving relationship that challenges partners to remain active in their efforts to maintain the relationship. While the components of a healthy relationship – passion, commitment and intimacy – may seem abstract, I have found specific actions through my practice as a clinical psychologist and marriage and family therapist that couples can do to prioritize their relationship and make it last.

• Continue or learn to communicate well. We all know to be polite to our bosses at work or strangers we meet, but it is often with those we are closest to that we slip into unhealthy habits of disrespect or inattentive listening. Most likely, at the point in your relationship when you plan to get married, you feel close and communicate well with your partner. It is over time that partners become busier, more distracted or simply make fewer efforts to communicate respectfully and openly with their spouses. But communication is a critical component to a healthy marriage. Couples must schedule time to check in with each other weekly. This “weekly check-in” may seem less necessary in the early years of marriage, but you will appreciate the habit later when work hours become longer and kids enter the picture. Use this time to coordinate schedules, check in about any issues in the relationship, and take time for each other away from technological distractions (that means no phones or TV in the background).

• Create a budget agreement. One of the most common areas of newlywed conflict is managing a joint budget. Even if you cohabitate with your partner before marriage, it is unlikely that you pooled all of your resources, and there is a lack of education about shared budgets. But money is important for your personal and relational well-being. Talk with your partner about your financial goals and concerns. Your spouse should be an equal partner in financial decisions. It is helpful for partners to regularly check in with each other about financial changes and decisions (you can easily incorporate this into your weekly check-ins). I advise couples to set a monthly personal budget – say $500 – that each partner can spend on individual expenses without consulting the other. If a partner wants to make a purchase that goes above the agreed-upon amount, he or she should wait until the other partner is consulted and agrees. By forming healthy spending habits and open communication about finances, partners can avoid one of the most common areas of marital conflict and feel closer as equals.

• Share responsibility for maintaining intimacy. In the early years of a relationship, intimacy seems to come naturally, so many partners take for granted the importance of actively maintaining a sense of emotional connection. This is not the responsibility of one partner, but a requirement that both spouses maintain an interest in fostering intimacy and keeping tabs on ways the other partner wishes to feel loved and cared for (because this does vary from person to person and over time). Date nights are a simple way to establish time to reconnect during a busy week, and they are essential in the early years of marriage and beyond. Take turns planning an evening for each other, and do not get trapped in thinking it has to be extravagant. If your lives are incredibly busy that week, find a time to relax at home or try to cook a new meal together.

Remember that human beings like novelty, so be willing to try new things together.

• Never be afraid to manage your differences. If I had to pick one major takeaway for couples considering marriage, it is to ensure that you are able to tell your partner when you are upset with him or her. That way your partner stands a chance of trying to fix the problem. Without this, resentment takes root and will continue to grow over time until it is addressed. This is so important because resentment often underlies any deficit in the previous points I made. It may sound basic, but it is often difficult for partners to place themselves in a vulnerable position where they can voice their concerns about the person closest to them. For couples to manage resentment, it is essential that partners create a safe conversational space where each can be heard and listen without feeling defensive or attacked. It is inevitable that you will have a different perspective than your partner at some point – whether regarding the family budget, division of household labor, or even the right way to show intimacy. Use any and every opportunity in the early years of marriage to practice talking with each other when one partner is upset with the other. Skills such as empathy, active listening and managing anger and frustration can be learned and need to be regularly utilized in couple conversation. For the Silo, Dr. Anne Brennan Malec.

Culture

Seniors Are Doing What Exactly Online?

June 9, 2020 The Silo 1 Comment

With 80% of baby boomers using the internet, it is clear that seniors are a lot more adept at using tech than we give them credit for. If you’re not convinced, just have a look at the statistics that MedAlertHelp compiled.

You will see that seniors are using the internet and smart devices a lot more regularly than most people would think. But what’s more interesting, perhaps, is the reason why they are using the internet. In this post, we will go through those reasons in more detail.

It’s Convenient

Raise your hands – who still uses an encyclopedia instead of checking the answer online? Do encyclopedias even exist anymore? Seniors are just as keen on using useful shortcuts as the rest of us.

Consider other apps that might be useful, such as internet banking, for example. In most cases, you’re not going to need to go to the bank unless you need to change your address or get a new card. Just about everything else you can do by using online banking or ATMs.

Easy Access to Information About Things That Interest Them

Most seniors cited that they enjoyed using the internet because it was an easy way to access information about things of interest. We can all relate to that. Just 20 years ago, learning something about your favorite hobby meant finding the right books or a person who could teach you.

Now, thanks to YouTube, that’s all changed. There is a wealth of information on the internet. Not all of it is great, but the support for hobbyists is nice. Want to learn how to crochet a jacket for your chicken? Google it – you will find a pattern. And, yes, there are people who crochet jackets for their chickens.

For Shopping

Online shopping and the elderly can be a match made in heaven, especially when there are mobility issues to consider. Online shopping has changed the world for a lot of us – making it possible to gain access to items that we cannot easily get otherwise.

But it can also be infinitely practical. You can shop for almost anything online, from groceries to clothing. This can be a boon for the elderly with mobility problems or issues finding transport.

For Entertainment Purposes

I have to be honest; this one was a bit of a surprise for me. Especially since I remembered growing up and being told that video games would rot my brain. However, almost half of the elderly who regularly use the net, also use it for entertainment purposes, like gaming.

Communication

The internet does provide us with a number of different ways to contact our families and keep in touch with friends. Seniors are taking advantage of services like Skype, Facebook, and other instant messaging services to keep in touch with the people who are important to them.

Conclusion

There is no doubt that the internet is a useful tool to make day to day living less complicated. We’re not counting the potential for wasting time on it here, though. But, if used correctly, the internet can save you time and a lot of stress. Is it any surprise that seniors are taking advantage of these benefits? For the Silo, Tarun Reddy.

Culture

Attachment Parenting Philosophy Says Sleeping With Your Children Is Normal

March 22, 2020 The Silo 2 Comments

Attachment parenting (AP) is a philosophy that basically means: the closer you keep your children to you, you provide a security, a centre. When children grow up, they are very compassionate, loving human beings. Parts of this style include extended breastfeeding, a safe sleep environment (close to parents) and baby-wearing and balance (martyrdom is not a requirement). The tenet of AP is that by meeting your baby’s needs, the child feels secure in their world.
One can practice AP while working. One can also practice AP while bottle feeding (dads don’t nurse). What matters most is meeting your baby’s needs and bonding. A newborn, a child, has basic needs. They need to eat (as humans, meant to drink Mamma’s milk), they need to poop/pee, they need to sleep, and they need to feel loved. Babies feel love by contact and closeness.

Hubby and I said that our babies would never sleep in our bed. From 6-9 months, my eldest and I barely slept. He woke up often to nurse, and with the stringent rules the nurses gave me at the hospital about nursing (rules which I now don’t agree), I was sleeping maybe 40 minutes between nursing sessions. In desperation, I brought him into our bed and ‘hid’ him there until he was around a year old. When Jeff finally discovered him, he said, “That’s why you have been so much nicer lately?” “Yes, because I could finally sleep!”

[The Big Bang Theory’s Mayim Bialik says attachment parenting is “a style of parenting that basically harkens to the way primates parent — things like natural birth, breast feeding, sleeping safely near your child, holding your child. ” CP]

I should say that the Canadian Pediatric Society says not to sleep with your child. But, there has been research the past 6 years that clearly shows that if certain precautions are in place (no smoking, drinking or drugs that put you into a deep sleep, never on a couch, and no pillows/blankets around baby’s face), sleeping with a parent is safe. Most babies who die sleeping with their parent had at LEAST one of those risk factors, if not more. A great website that will give a fully informed choice is (http://www.isisonline.org.uk/). Sleeping with your children is a contentious topic in western culture, but quite normal overseas.

I was a full time midwifery student when my baby girl (last of 4 children) was 7 months. I still was an AP’er. We both slept better at night. She stayed connected to me even though I was gone during the day or days. Of my 4 children (now ranging from 8-16), none have been bullies. They all left our bed. They all stopped nursing when we both chose. It worked for us.

dadbabysurfnet — This Digital Dad could use a sling… “Ever since my baby boy was born on February first, everyone keeps asking the same thing. How is it that I can find so much time for video games? Having a baby is very time consuming and, even with my generous 6 weeks of parental leave, I still found it hard to find time for myself (ie: gaming time).
That is, before I discovered that my shoulder is more comfortable to a newborn than any bed, pillow, blanket or hammock made by man” from http://tinyurl.com/2qlcm4

Baby-wearing is AWESOME in a mall. Strangers do not enter your private space to look at your child, as they would if your child was in a stroller. They see the world from the safety of mom or dad’s arms. This type of parenting may not work for everyone. No judgement. Like breastfeeding, the choice is with the parent, not society. My children are very resilient and loving human beings. For the Silo, Stephanie MacDonald.

Sci-Tech

Hypnotherapy

May 29, 2019 The Silo Leave a comment

hypnotherapist So many of my clients bring interesting cases to me, everyone is different and so therefore interesting in their own way. But one case that stands out was a client who had “misophonia” – which meant that she experienced a heightened feeling of anxiety or “fight or flight response” in response to certain sounds – mainly that of other people eating. It was becoming difficult even eating around her family. This was a case for hypnotherapy.

With just two sessions we completely solved the problem, We went back in time to her childhood where the problem began – with just a very innocent situation (she didn’t really remember this consciously) but her subconscious mind had held onto it and certain sounds still triggered anxiety. And rather than getting better over time, it was getting worse. Going back to that event, in a safe and controlled way, meant that the problem was resolved almost immediately.

What I described above is known as regression hypnotherapy. It’s all about going back in time to where the problem was first triggered. When people have problematic emotions which are being repeatedly triggered, such as panic, anxiety, depression, etc. , it is usually because something happened which wasn’t fully processed at the time and then the subconscious mind holds onto that feeling, thinking that it’s protecting you.

Once you go back to it, and process the “memory” properly (I say memory in inverted commas because often we don’t remember the event consciously, but it’s stored away in our subconscious which is like a giant library). So once we go back to the original event the subconscious is able to understand that it’s over now and releases the emotion. It is extremely powerful and cathartic. There is more information about regression hypnotherapy in my blog post here: http://www.synergy-wellbeing.com/category/regression/

Are there any preparations required before embarking on hypnotherapy?

"You're getting sleepy." — “You’re getting sleepy.”

Not really. I often recommend that people don’t drink a lot of caffeine before a session because this triggers the fight / flight response – which is the opposite to the relaxation response – so it can interfere with the session a little and make it harder to relax. But other than that, no. Someone who meditates or is good at visualization will generally find they go into hypnosis a lot more quickly, but everyone can be hypnotized. We’re in a state of hypnosis when we watch the television!

I would love to help someone who feels that they are “over–sensitive” – and I would prefer to call it “highly sensitive” myself – because their sensitivities could relate back to childhood and things they are subconsciously holding onto which distressed them. Regression hypnotherapy can help to release the memories trapped in the subconscious so that those emotions are not triggered so readily or inappropriately in the future. EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) is also an excellent technique which I teach my clients a lot – and this can used as a self help tool whenever needed too, on a daily basis even!

How can we enable our subconscious to let go of bad feelings?

There is a technique which I use myself a lot, and also teach people about. It’s called mindfulness. The sad thing is that we are often told “don’t get upset / don’t cry, etc.” so we learn to push our feelings down – we suppress them. Another word for suppression is depression. So we can easily become depressed when we suppress our true feelings. One of the beautiful things that mindfulness teaches us is to be present as much as possible to our experience. So if you’re feeling angry, or hurt, for example, it’s much better to allow yourself to “feel” that feeling.

Contrary to popular belief, this doesn’t make it feel worse, it actually really helps! So, next time you’re feeling bad – ask yourself “how am I feeling? What does that feel like? Where do I feel that in my body?” – really acknowledge it. And – hey presto! The feeling seriously diminishes or disappears altogether! Our feelings just want to be listened to, to be heard. So once we do this, they are satisfied and they settle back down.

EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) is something else I practice, and this is wonderful for allowing us to let go of negative emotions. It is also known as the “tapping technique” and more information can be found on my website. For the Silo, Liz Davies Clinical Hypnotherapist and EFT Practitioner.

Culture

How Societies Become Consumer Cultures Through Housing

April 14, 2019 The Silo 1 Comment

Alfred Marshall’s (Principles of Economics, 1891) view of housing still goes right to the heart of what makes housing and built environment an important anthropological topic. No artifact is so clearly multi-functional, simultaneously a utilitarian object of absolute necessity, and an item of symbolic material culture, a text of almost unending complexity.

In every house the economic, social and symbolic dimensions of behavior come together. This may be why the analysis of housing has had such a wide appeal in disciplines as diverse as social psychology, folklore, economics and engineering. Anthropologists themselves have shown a new willingness to consider the house as a key artifact in understanding the articulation of economic and social change during economic development.

From the perspective of our own contemporary society, surrounded by houses of all shapes and sizes, where wealth and luxury are synonymous with housing, this seems obvious and commonplace. The 1980’s television show “Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous” and journals like “Architectural Review” are odes to the home as a shrine and symbol of wealth. But just as clearly, there are societies where all the houses look alike, even though all the people are not alike. Perhaps then, the assumption that there is something natural and obvious about spending on the house and home market as a marker of prestige is ethnocentric. Why the house instead of something else?

A number of anthropological approaches attempt to place the house in a theoretical context which answer this question by relating housing to social, economic, and psychological variation and change. For example, a utilitarian approach that views the house partially as a workspace links changes in the elaboration of houses to changes in the kinds of work done in the household (Braudel 1973:201). Or if the house is seen as a reflection of how all household activities are organized and divided, then the shape of the house will change as activities are modified, differentiated, or recombined (Kent 1983, 1984).

An even more utilitarian perspective relates the form of the house to climate, technology and the kinds of building materials that are available (Duly 1979). For the Silo, Richard R. Wilk.

Read on..click here and read the full PDF document on your device.

Supplemental- Complete Text Principles of Economics (London: Macmillan and Co. 8th ed. 1920).
Author: Alfred Marshall
About This Title: This is the 8th edition of what is regarded to be the first “modern” economics textbook, leading in various editions from the 19th into the 20th century. The final 8th edition was Marshall’s most-used and most-cited.

Culture

Ways To Retrain And Put Your Adult Brain Back In Charge

March 20, 2019 The Silo Leave a comment

Jungian Psychology uses art-therapy, dreams and imagery in mapping personal and collective unconscious, archetypes and complexes. Jung believed that there were fears and thoughts that children and adults exhibit that are "remarkably similar across time and culture" (allpsych.com) image: skycladtherapist.files.wordpress.com — Jungian Psychology uses art-therapy, dreams and imagery in mapping personal and collective unconscious, archetypes and complexes. Jung believed that there were fears and thoughts that children and adults exhibit that are “remarkably similar across time and culture” (allpsych.com) image: skycladtherapist.files.wordpress.com

The human brain is a wonder of the universe, but our understanding of it can seem contradictory, says Steven Jay Fogel, author of the book Your Mind Is What Your Brain Does for a Living.

“On the one hand, we’re often told of those crucial years that our brain develops in childhood, when we’re rapidly progressing in development of our language and other skills, and our preadolescent and teenage years, when our brains undergo a sort of second Big Bang of learning,” says Fogel, (www.StevenJayFogel.com).

“But although it may seem that the brain is pretty much set by adulthood, it remains malleable throughout adulthood; it continues to change as we learn and adapt.”

Most of us are unaware that elements of our inner child’s development are constantly tugging at us, and we don’t have a clue that it’s happening, he says. In Jungian therapy there’s a concept called the dark side, or shadow side, the place in our unconscious to which certain feelings and thoughts are banished because they don’t support our image of ourselves, he says.

Steven Jay Fogel is a longtime student of human behavior and development. — Steven Jay Fogel is a longtime student of human behavior and
development.

“That is our inner child responding to the emotional pain we experienced and interpreted with the limited understanding we had when we were very young. It continues to steer our reactions and behavior as adults, often in inappropriate ways,” Fogel says.

Awareness creates an opportunity for change. Fogel reviews how our adult brain can take command of the inner child:

• Recognize the elements of your self identity that keep you trapped. Our identity – how we want the world to see us – develops, in part, as a response to avoiding pain. Our identity may change from one situation to another (in the same way a chameleon changes its body color to match its surroundings) as we slip on the persona we believe is expected in a particular environment or social setting. This automatic behavior is the opposite of making mindful choices, and it robs us of the joy of living in the moment and inhibits spontaneity.

• Be aware of when you’re acting. Many of us live our lives as though we’re playing parts in various movies, navigating different storylines every day. You may be the righteous Clint Eastwood manager at work and then shift into the town drunk during happy hour, and later the loving husband and father during brunch the following weekend morning. When you’re playing these roles, you’re not in the present.

• Be skeptical of what the voice in your head may tell you. It’s not easy to recognize and quiet the mental chatter associated with the different roles we play. We’ve become so accustomed to the voice in our head, that we don’t realize its messages are programmed – and not necessarily the truth. Is your voice telling you to feel guilty? Ashamed? Angry? Is that rational? If not, it may be your inner child acting out of a childlike fear.

“Instead of simply responding to what we’re hardwired to think and react, we can hear, in mindful repose, those promptings as simply chatter,” Fogel says. “When you’re mindful, the inner child’s chatter can be seen for what it is, and you will be free to take a more mature directionin your day-to-day living.”

Steven Jay Fogel is a longtime student of human behavior and development; he has studied with psychologists, educators, and rabbinical scholars. Your Mind Is What Your Brain Does for a Living, (Greenleaf Book Group Press, 2014), is his third book. He is also the author of My Mind Is Not Always My Friend: A Guide for How to Not Get in Your Own Way (Fresh River Press, 2010) and The Yes-I-Can Guide to Mastering Real Estate (Times Books-Random House). For decades he has been an active participant in the human potential movement, inspiring and mentoring others to seek their true selves. Fogel is a principal and cofounder of Westwood Financial Corp., one of the largest owner-operators of retail properties in the United States. He is a licensed real estate broker and past chairman of the California Arts Council.

Supplemental- Synchronicity is the experience of two or more events that are apparently causally unrelated or unlikely to occur together by chance, yet are experienced as occurring together in a meaningful manner. The concept of synchronicity was first described in this terminology by Carl Gustav Jung, a Swiss psychologist, in the 1920s.
The concept does not question, or compete with, the notion of causality. Instead, it maintains that just as events may be grouped by cause, they may also be grouped by meaning. A grouping of events by meaning need not have an explanation in terms of cause and effect.

Culture

Appetite For Failing Public Figures Continues To Be Satiated

October 15, 2018 The Silo Leave a comment

Yes this post’s title bears repeating. The public’s appetite for failing public figures continues to be satiated. But beyond the face value of these stories, should the public have deeper concerns about their causes and what could they be indicative of beyond sexual obsession? According to Dr. David M. Reiss, what is more pertinent to analyze is the self-defeating, self-sabotage aspect of these actions, and essentially the unconscious self-hatred and hatred of anyone who cares for them (i.e., humiliation of a wife).

According to Reiss, “We are getting away from one on the true critical issue — masochism. It is the acting out of the self-hatred by politicians through their legislation and power that is actually infinitely more dangerous to the public than any particular sexual activities. What more don’t we know about their behaviors behind the scenes and what else may manifest?”

In addition, the so-called treatment for someone is nothing more than a publicity play to help “fix” the problem in the public eye. The idea of his going into an “intensive treatment program” for two weeks is a joke. Especially at age 70, with decades of this type of behavior, a program like that can’t do anything but perhaps a diagnostic evaluation and set a course for ongoing therapy – with a poor prognosis. Otherwise, it’s an insult to the idea of therapy to think that two weeks could be of any significant effect.

David M. Reiss is a practicing psychiatrist for 30 years and recognized internationally for his expertise in character and personality dynamics. He has performed more than 10,000 psychiatric evaluations; evaluated and treated patients from diverse social and cultural backgrounds, and from every occupational field. He is an in-demand lecturer and has been published and covered in academic journals as well and general consumer media. For the Silo, Alyssa LaManna.

Politics

Tinkering Won’t Fix Crisis In Ontario Corrections And Jails

April 12, 2018 The Silo 1 Comment

In December of 2015, I toured the aging Thunder Bay District Jail. The nearly century-old jail had recently been the scene of a riot that led to a correctional officer being taken hostage – 70 inmates took control of the upper floor for a period of 20 hours.

In Ontario, assaults on correctional officers and other staff have more than doubled over the past seven years.

Last year, a report by the Independent Advisor on Corrections Reform described shocking abuse and disorder in Ontario’s detention centres – centres that are overcrowded and violent.

After violent incidents, inmates are often held in solitary confinement without access to rehab programs, and lockdowns are often the only recourse because of short staffing.

Much of the violence in Ontario’s detention centres is derived from smuggled weapons and drugs – but officers are restricted in their ability to conduct searches.

Front-line officers tell us they feel they are in danger – they are outnumbered, and they have little recourse when they’re attacked.

Ontario’s probation and parole system is a joke — that’s exactly what criminals have called it. Our probation and parole officers are not to blame. In many cases, they are actively discouraged from checking up on criminals by making house visits because of insufficient resources. Offenders are often left to self-report but, obviously, very few do.

Over 45,000 former inmates are out on parole or probation being forced to self-report. And 60 per cent of these individuals are deemed medium to high risk, that’s 27,000 individuals free to roam our province.

How can this out of touch government make the claim that our communities are safe?

Why did this current government allow this to happen? That’s the question that needs to be asked.

The present provincial government recently introduced Bill 6, to supposedly deal with the issue. But this government has a history of producing incomplete, skeletal and poorly-thought-out legislation, and Bill 6 is no exception. The Correctional Services Transformation Act is supposed to be a thorough overhaul of a broken correctional system, but it has the same deficiencies as most other legislation of late.

Obviously, the Liberals are inclined to think more bureaucracy is a solution to every problem, but more paper-pushing isn’t going to solve that problem.

Minor tinkering isn’t going to fix the crisis in corrections. The government must take serious and thorough action.

Has this government decided that the needs and wants of incarcerated criminals are more important than the rights of correctional officers and the order and safety of our detention centres are secondary to making criminals feel comfortable. Obviously, this legislation – Bill 6 — must be compliant with the written portion of our Constitution and our common-law traditions. But it must be said corrections officers and all prison staff have rights as well.

As my colleague MPP Rick Nichols, our critic for the Ministry of Community Safety and Correctional Services has been saying, there has been a crisis in corrections for years in the making. Now with an election looming, the Liberals want us to believe — with Bill 6 — they’re experiencing a deathbed conversion. For the Silo, Toby Barrett, MPP for Haldimand-Norfolk.

Culture

Messenger Kids Facebook App Creeps Technology Into Family Life

December 11, 2017 The Silo 10 Comments

On December 4, the New York Times ran an article about how Facebook just introduced a new app called Messenger Kids. According to Facebook, this app makes it easier for kids to safely video chat and message family and friends. Per their privacy policy, the app collects registration details from parents such as a child’s full name. It also collects the texts, audio and videos children send, as well as information about whom the child interacts with on the service, what features they use and how long the children use them. In launching this new app, Facebook has ignited a fierce debate about how young is too young for children to use mobile apps and how do parents deal with the creep of technology into family life.

One mother has stepped into the debate with an alternative. Janice Taylor created a website and application called Mazu, which teaches children and families how to use digital media responsibly and become positive digital citizens. She cautions parents and says they need to ask themselves, “do you trust Facebook as a medium to protect your children?”

Bing search engine results for “Facebook messenger kids”

“Facebook’s only goal is to monetize a new user base and beat SnapChat at it. Children should never be used as ammunition in the Social Media war for dominance.” Taylor explains.

Based on the concept that “It takes a village to raise a child,” Taylor takes the position that every adult has a role to play in the well-being of the child and society. Taylor created Mazu to build a healthy digital village for families that is founded in love and core values. “Traditional social media preys on our desires to be liked, to be validated, and to be rewarded. That’s why the ‘Like’ button is so addicting and why we at Mazu don’t have one.”

Since its inception in 2010, Mazu, with over 250,000 users and growing, has evolved and now, through partnerships with professional sports teams, has brought the ‘it takes a village’ mentality online. With a suite of family friendly apps, Mazu connects kids to their family, friends, and teams/ brands they love in a way that is safe, healthy and fun. To date they have raised more than $6 million from non-Silicon Valley companies.

A recent Reuters Facebook post about Facebook Messenger Kids

“We believe that parents matter in the digital lives of their children, that’s why our COPPA-certified apps are created with parents in mind. We believe in the power of family and staying connected,” says Taylor. “By building our products around a set of values and using the community to build each other up, we believe we can create better digital citizens.”

Janice Taylor is a social entrepreneur, mother, inspirational speaker, author, and online safety advocate. She has a Bachelor of Arts in Psychology with an Honors thesis that focused on self-esteem and self-efficacy among women. It was from this research that she sought to create a solution to the issue of social media addiction and how it was affecting women, children, and families. For the Silo, Trina Kaye. Have something to say about this article? Leave us a video comment by clicking record below or use the comment section at the bottom of this page to type us a response.

[vidrack align=”center” ext_id=”345″ desc=”Leave us a video comment by clicking the record button”]

Culture

University Of Pittsburgh Professor Asks Teachers To Decentralize Race

October 23, 2017 The Silo Leave a comment

H. Richard Milner, a professor, noted researcher and expert on race in education at the University of Pittsburgh believes that “education is the key to addressing inequity and racism in society” and if we are not “working in education to combat racism, we are complicit in maintaining inequity and the status quo.” Are teachers prepared and willing to take this on? Milner notes that teachers “can struggle with tools to advance justice-centered curriculum and instructional opportunities that work against racism” and therefore education programs for teachers must support them “in developing knowledge and skills in ways that centralize race so that students can examine both localized and global perspectives and worldviews.” Additionally, school administrators and policies must be in place that “advance agendas that encourage and expect race-central learning opportunities and especially discourse.” Beyond these stakeholders, Milner recommends that students, community members, families and parents be part of the learning discourse “providing perspectives about their own worlds and experiences.”

This month we opened up the conversation on racism in education to our global Millennial Bloggers. The Millennial Bloggers are based all over the world. They are innovators in entrepreneurship, journalism, education, entertainment, health and well-being and academic scholarship. We asked them: Do we need to talk more about racism in Education?

“When I was 14, in our first class of Literature in English, I remember our teacher saying, rather solemnly, that our subject is called Literature in English, rather than English Literature,” writes Bonnie Chiu. “It was a moment of enlightenment for me. It instilled in me this critical mindset, this yearning to challenge the status quo; and it gave me a sense of agency.”

“We can’t afford to defer the conversation about white supremacy for even a single moment longer. It has proven itself to be the most obstinate social institution in the entire history of America,” writes Francisco Hernandez. “How could we even possibly think we could fight something so tough if we can’t even talk about what it means to fight it?”

“Any nation that can stomach the principle of caste, which is the most brutal ‘classification’ of human beings based on birth anywhere in the world, cannot help but differentiate, and differentiate repeatedly, on the basis of every parameter society can construct in a desperate and insular bid to separate ‘us’ from ‘them’,” writes Harmony Siganporia. “Nothing short of critical pedagogical interventions which would overhaul what we consider to be the very purpose of our educational system, and the resources to channel these interventions into more meaningful curricular design, can help us change these terms of engagement.”

“Textbooks were created by people who lived in a racist society,” writes Jacob Navarrete. “I’m telling you there are better tools. I’d be happy to help you learn how to use them. There is a big world to build outside the cave and we could use your help. It might hurt at first, just like the light does when you exit a dark cave.”

“Racism cannot be explained or understood properly without incorporating a discussion about privilege,” writes Dominique Dryding. “Until educational institutions take the lived experiences of their student bodies seriously and recognize that racism does not only include name calling and physical exclusion, racism in schools and universities will not end.”

Guest Blogger Salathia Carr writes, “Racism is not something that can be swept under the rug. After so much sweeping, your rug becomes distorted. People have become so desensitized regarding racism and injustices because they truly do not know what it is like. Judgment is very easy to make when you’re not living that way. But, if we force discussions about inequality from the very first history class we take, you cannot avoid it.” For the Silo, C.M. Rubin.

The Millennial Bloggers are Alusine Barrie, Sajia Darwish, James Kernochan, Kamna Kathuria, Jacob Deleon Navarrete, Reetta Heiskanen, Shay Wright, Isadora Baum, Wilson Carter III, Francisco Hernandez, Erin Farley, Dominique Alyssa Dryding, Harry Glass, Harmony Siganporia and Bonnie Chiu.

Top Row: C.M. Rubin, Alusine Barrie, Sajia Darwish, James Kernochan

2nd Row: Kamna Kathuria, Jacob Deleon Navarrete, Reetta Heiskanen, Shay Wright

3rd Row: Isadora Baum, Wilson Carter III, Francisco Hernandez, Erin Farley

Bottom Row: Dominique Alyssa Dryding, Harry Glass, Harmony Siganporia, Bonnie Chiu

Culture

Natural World Immediacy A Rare Concept

August 15, 2017 The Silo Leave a comment

Immediacy? “Nothing important comes into being overnight; even grapes or figs need time to ripen. If you say that you want a fig now, I will tell you to be patient. First, you must allow the tree to flower, then put forth fruit; then you have to wait until the fruit is ripe. So if the fruit of a fig tree is not brought to maturity instantly or in an hour, how do you expect the human mind to come to fruition, so quickly and easily?” -Epictetus

TheWormForSiloSite

watershort2_0002

The Worm (2008) and Watershort (2008) are time-contemplative short films by Canadian sound and visual artist Jarrod Barker.

In the natural world, immediacy is rarely a concept. While it is true the Mayfly lives only for a day, it is also true that each fly is one infinitesimal link in the long succession of the species. As humans have increasingly stepped beyond the boundaries of nature, we have begun to forget the importance of waiting and patience. We live surrounded by cheap treasures gotten easily and quickly. But like the Mayfly, these spoils of instant gratification perish quickly leaving us desiring more. No longer do we answer to the rhythm of nature, preferring instead to force the world to step up to our breakneck pace. All the while we are saturated with reminders that “good things come to those who wait” but too often choose to ignore this time tested wisdom.

Stefan Klein works in Berlin. Presently he is examining the concept of waiting. To this end, he has conducted quite a lot of field research. Waiting, he says, “is something that’s so routinely existing in our daily lives but at the same time has this very existential dimension to it so that almost everybody can relate to it but at the same time it’s a very abstract topic.” Another project, titled Introduction to Microeconomics is a book documenting Klein’s repeated ordering and return of a book by the same name. In this way, he examined documentation as a vital element of a whole work. Much of Klein’s work investigates complex systems through performative means. In September, Klein will begin a series of waiting sessions with people from various disciplines. He will meet with guests at a bus stop (a place of waiting) for a conversation. His audience will be comprised of both those who came to see the performance and those who happened to be waiting for the bus. In this way, Klein will access waiting from many perspectives.

Emilie Clark is a New York City based artist who spends part of the year in New Hampshire. Much of her work is based on the work of nineteenth-century natural historians and scientists, most of them women. She also explores the literal interpretation of the word ecology (earth’s household) incorporating historical texts and working in the landscape. In New Hampshire, Clark works in a floating research station surrounded by the natural world. In New York City her experience is quite different though she has noticed similarities in plant species between the two locations. From her research station, Clark collects specimens, makes sound recordings, draws, paints, preserves, and fully immerses herself in nature. This process is rooted not only in creating but in learning.

A Few Words to Keep in your Pocket

A work of art, a career, a relationship, anything worth investing our hearts and minds in, must be given time. We must relearn to wait, to fall back in step with the world around us. For the Silo, Brainard Carey.

Brainard is currently giving free webinars on how to write a better Artist bio and statement and how to get a show in a gallery – you can register for that live webinar and ask questions live by clicking here.

Culture

eBay Canada Set Sights On Kijiji Shoppers With Test Integration Project

February 7, 2017 The Silo Leave a comment

Back in 2017, eBay Canada and Kijiji Canada launched a test to bring increased visibility to Canadian eBay inventory: eBay listings for certain items located in Canada were integrated into search results on Kijiji – the #1 classifieds site in the country. Kijiji buyers were given the opportunity to connect with relevant eBay inventory, and eBay sellers were able to gain exposure to Kijiji’s more than 16 million unique monthly visitors.

Listing Ads Served Within Listing Ads

This inventory integration project was part of ongoing global efforts to create synergies across eBay Inc.’s businesses.

Canadian eBay sellers were asked to keep the following in mind regarding the inventory integration test:

#1. It was a test. We were adjusting listing integration parameters based on a variety of criteria – including Kijiji buyer behaviour and eBay listing performance – to ensure we are delivering the best possible experience for eBay sellers and Kijiji buyers. This test would evolve based on our learnings.

#2. The test was small-scale. Only one or two eBay items were shown in any given Kijiji result set, and only for selected searches.

#3. eBay sellers did not need to do anything at the time. eBay listings for inventory located in Canada were automatically made eligible for exposure in Kijiji search results. There was no opt-in process required; there were no additional fees required; and there were no account settings that needed to be adjusted.

Fast forward to today- if you are a Kijiji Canada user you may be surprised by how many eBay ads are now served as the test is now a permanent fixture. For the Silo, Russ Patterson, COO and Director of Product Management, eBay Canada.

Supplemental- Collectibles market has been hit hard.

Mr. Thrifter: eBay vs craigslist vs kijiji vs Amazon – Where should I sell my stuff?

Culture

A Basic Visual Guide On Helping Your Children Through Divorce

February 3, 2017 The Silo Leave a comment

For children, divorce can be an extremely upsetting and stressful time. Their world changes and it’s confusing. They may feel uncertain, scared, angry, hurt and depressed. As a parent, you can make the process less stressful for your children by being aware of ways to make the process less unsettling for them.

Your understanding, patience and reassurance can help greatly in your child’s adjustment. The infographic below via our friends at Browell Smith & Co Solicitors shows ways for you to reduce your child’s pain by making their well-being the most important part of the transition.

Art

Across The Arts Vulnerability Prevails And Here’s Why It’s An Asset

January 4, 2017 The Silo 1 Comment

Just for a moment, think about all of the many career fields in the world. Now think about those that require a personal emotional investment as a matter of course.

How many bankers make a regular practice of exposing their deepest insecurities to the world through their work? How many veterinarians routinely put on display the most precious and personal aspects of their hearts and minds? Probably not that many. As an artist, you are literally doing this all the time. Whether the emotional investment is major or minor, and whether you are exposing personal joys or defeats, the fact remains that careers in the arts by their very nature involve a whole lot of very personal investment. Unfortunately, some artists view this as a liability and allow the idea that they don’t possess the right self-esteem to affect their ability to work. It is important to find ways to lay these insecurities to rest and accept that by its very nature, art puts us in a vulnerable space. Embrace this rather than allowing it to overwhelm you, consider it an asset going forward.

Across the arts fields, vulnerability prevails. It is what often informs some of the most beautiful work. Whether we are talking about a performer or a visual artist, human nature dictates that when we put ourselves out into the world in the way that an artist does, there is a certain measure of vulnerability built in to the equation. It is a rare thing indeed to find a performer who doesn’t experience the butterflies of stage fright however subtly, no matter how seasoned he or she may be. And it is equally unlikely to find an artist who operates from a place of pure confidence free of the weight of uncertainty.

The world of art, not to mention the world at large, would be a very different place if insecurity did not exist. If everyone walked around with stiff confidence all the time there would be no room for tenderness, bravery, courage, and the bonding commonality of vulnerability that we all experience which is often the key to connecting an audience to a work of art. Every human alive understands what it is like to feel overwhelmed and uncertain and it is often this understanding that leads people to seek out art as a means of connecting to others through this shared human emotion.

Self-esteem has become a buzz word without a strong definition to back it up. We allow it to inform us as though it is some sentient entity that can make or break our resolve as artists. The fact is, self-esteem is merely a label for the way we view ourselves. It is us, and us alone, who decide how we approach the world. Allowing a vague concept like self-esteem to stand in the way of creating something that speaks to the very soul of who you are makes as much sense as allowing a phobia of flying stop you from seeing the world. You must conquer these self-made fears and come out on the other side.

Jackson Pollock Number 1 1950 Lavender Mist

The fact is, there is no way around baring your very soul as an artist. Whether it is only a glimpse or whether you let it all hang out for the world to see, in every work you create there is, inherently, a very personal piece of you. Without this, your work would lack meaning and depth. People view art expecting the spectacle of human emotion. To deny this because of some feeling of low self-esteem is to deny an opportunity to yourself and your audience.

There are no guarantees in life, everything we do carries a risk. Every career has its risks and benefits, though these vary wildly across the spectrum depending on what field we look at. Art is no different. There are no guarantees. Sometimes you will expose your most private self and receive less than gentle feedback. Under no circumstances should this give you anything more than a moment’s pause. Brush off, stand up, and get back to it. Use these experiences to further inform your work. Explore the feeling of exposure and the insecurities of this concept of self-esteem. Look fear in the eye and let it look right back.

Ultimately it is up to you how you choose to face the very real challenges of so-called self-esteem in your work as an artist. Only you can know your own limits, and only you can be brave enough to step beyond them. No one ever achieved very much who didn’t expose their inner selves to total annihilation. While this may sound like a terrifying prospect, consider why you are sitting here reading this blog in the first place. If you’re an artist, by simply declaring to the world that you are an artist, you have already chosen the path of courage. You have willingly stepped into the ring with your heart on your sleeve. There’s no turning back now. For the Silo, Brainard Carey.

Supplemental- The start of abstract expressionism challenged “safe, established painting styles”

Reviews

Silo Book Spotlight- A Practical Guide to Emotional Intelligence

December 14, 2015 The Silo Leave a comment

Feelings are at the core of every social interaction. Anger, fear, and sadness are all very different concepts, but together they form part of an emotional compass that allows people to appropriately deal with each other in everyday situations. In short, unlocking the true power behind a person’s feelings – even challenging ones – is actually the key to clarity, love, and a happier life.

As a way to help you understand your feelings and develop your own emotional intelligence, business coach, speaker, and bestselling author Vivian Dittmar has written the insightful book, The Power of Feelings: A Practical Guide to Emotional Intelligence. In this groundbreaking work, Dittmar takes the reader on an introspective journey by examining the inner workings of the human mind and heart. She explains at length the difference between feelings and emotions, how each are created, why each has its own purpose, and why everything you “feel” is not always a feeling.

Divided into five easy-to-read sections, The Power of Feelings is a comprehensive guidebook with 12 self-assessment exercises for exploring your life. By working through these exercises, Dittmar ultimately teaches how understanding and harnessing the power behind your feelings are the keys to your emotional potential and intelligence.

In this fascinating and eye-opening book, Dittmar also reveals:

The Five Powers of Anger, Sadness, Fear, Joy, and Shame: How each fulfills an important function in your life
Turning Negative Feelings Into Positive Forces: Why some feelings that are typically considered to be “bad” can be used to your benefit
Emotional Baggage: Some of the most effective ways to deal with past emotional issues
Blocks of Emotional Intelligence: Common causes of emotional imbalances
Living Feelings: How to incorporate conscious feelings into your daily life

“When I felt it was time to write my first book, I took a look at what was on the market in the field of personal development and felt the greatest deficit was in the realm of feelings and emotions,” says Dittmar. “I had been emotionally challenged in my life and was unsatisfied with the answers I could find. This dissatisfaction caused me to start investigating the matter within me, with the people I worked with, and in seminars and groups. When it was time to write the book, we collected questions about feelings from people of all walks of life looking for the same answers. This material later became the first version of The Power of Feelings.”

Vivian Dittmar grew up on three continents in three different cultures. In doing so, she developed a unique perspective on humans and their interactions. Traveling between first, second, and third-world nations, she was struck by the contrast between people’s external wealth and their corresponding life issues. Her experiences led her to pursue a career in the fields of self-help and personal development.

Throughout her career, Dittmar has worked in Germany, Indonesia, Australia, Thailand, Costa Rica, Italy, Greece, and Sweden. In Indonesia, she ran her own practice working with clients from all backgrounds. She then returned to Europe and set up the non-profit, Be the Change Foundation for Cultural Change. The foundation offers educational events to raise awareness about ecological and social justice issues.

Dittmar also works as a trainer and coach. As a coach, she helps small and mid-sized business owners and executives develop their emotional intelligence. She is also the author of three successful books – the first of which has been translated from German into English, Italian, and Spanish. Dittmar currently lives between Germany and Italy and is a mother of two sons.

Books are available on VivianDittmar.com and Amazon.com. E-books are also available on Kindle. Connect with Dittmar on Twitter.com and Facebook.com.

Culture

1,969 Words on Having Experienced Domestic Abuse

September 23, 2014 The Silo Leave a comment

Dear Silo,

In light of the [RayNFL domestic abuse controversy, I decided to write to you about my experience of domestic abuse.

My abuser was my husband. We had children. We had good jobs. People told us how happy we looked.

I had to look happy. He demanded my loyalty. He demanded I speak publicly, often at church, about how much I loved him and was grateful to him for providing for me and the children.

I was raped constantly. Not by knife, though, and not by physical restraints. He ruled my brain and body, he told me. As his wife, it was demanded that I have sex with him whenever he wanted. If I said no, he would be angry for days, calling me names, telling me that no other man would ever want me, that if I didn’t give it to him, he would take the children and never give them back. He would email me at work to continue the fight during the day. He would text me at night if I wasn’t with him.

When I came home from work one day to find all of my belongings on the front yard, I believed he was telling me the truth. I felt like an ungrateful woman who treated her husband horribly. My church leaders even told me that a husband could not rape his wife. One did tell me to leave, but I wasn’t strong enough then.

He took the air out of my tires so I couldn’t go out with a girlfriend. One of our children witnessed it.

I finally turned to the police. They wrote our episodes up as domestic disputes, which didn’t break the Canada’s Criminal Code (I have the reports, highly redacted). My husband was too smart to do something for which he could be charged.

Neighbours called the Police on him. My family also called the Police, afraid he was going to kill me because of a status on Facebook they thought was directed at me. The OPP showed up, questioned him, but did nothing when he said he would never harm me.

He kept a knife under his pillow. Why? He told our children that he felt I was going to kill him in his sleep and he had to be protected from me.

I was accused of many affairs. I was unfaithful to him even if I talked with a girlfriend on the phone. I was told that when I was home, I was to only spend time with family, but he meant with him. I couldn’t watch tv with the kids because he demanded that I stay with him.

On nights when I chose to get away from him to watch tv with them, he would bombard me with texts, telling me how horrible I was, keeping my attention on him, not the kids. On really bad days, he would charge into the room where I was with the kids to yell at me there, making sure they knew I was horrible, too.

He told me for 6 years that he wanted a divorce, to keep me in fear of breaking up the family. He would tell me that no man would want to be with a mom of so many kids. He also said that if I ever found someone to be with me, he would make sure he told him about the kinky sex I liked (true or not). I was damaged goods. No one would want me.

For years, I thought that was all I was worth.

That changed. Five years ago, I started planning to get out. It took that long because I had to convince myself that, even if I stayed single, the children and I deserved to not live on egg shells anymore.\

I had to find the strength to be a single mom.

Five years of getting my ducks in a row. Five years of emotionally divorcing him in my head.

When I told him I wanted a divorce, he begged to stay. He told the oldest children without me in the room that I asked for the divorce, that I was kicking him out. My kids hated me.

Then, he played the cancer card. He told the oldest children that the doctors suspected he had cancer and I was still kicking him out of the house. The day he before he was to have his scope, I asked him why he wasn’t clearing out his colon, like I had to do when I had mine scoped. He yelled at me, told me I didn’t know what I was talking about and went to our room.

Well, by then, it was his room alone. I was kicked out.

He told the kids he was moving east on a Friday. With our youngest away for the weekend at a camp with me, she kept asking if her dad was going to be home when she got there. When was he leaving? She was in knots all weekend. He didn’t tell her that he chose to stay. We found out when we got home.

Two weeks later, he said he was moving again. He actually packed the car this time. He said his good-byes before they left for school. He got as far as Quebec when he begged to come back. I refused.

He lived in his car. He lived in a cheap hotel. He told the kids I put him on the street. He emailed or texted me constantly to 1) let him back in, promising he’d change or 2) he’d make sure the kids knew it was all my fault. He told them he’d do anything to let him back in but I refused to forgive him.

Forgiveness was never an issue for me. It was a refusal to live under fear and anger any longer.

The kids and I didn’t have stress in our house anymore after he moved out. It only took a few days of him being away before they told me the house felt so much better without him there, without him yelling anymore.

Then he did something which put the fear back into my heart, fear that he could really hurt us this time. Until then, he had never done anything physical.

When I called the OPP to report it, they put everything back on me. I was told to stop slinging mud at him. They said I was never afraid for my safety before, so this episode was nothing. I was just trying to get him in trouble.

What do you do when the people you most trust to protect you, don’t? The church and the OPP did nothing to help. He was (is) a charmer and manipulator, he had everyone believing he was innocent of everything. Remember, a wife can’t say no to her husband.

I was not perfect. No one is. I was diagnosed with PTSD not long after he moved out.

But people have to stop blaming the victims of abuse for the abuse. We don’t ask for it. He was mad at me by my daily living, why would I do something deliberately to piss him off? No one deserves name-calling, harassment, manipulated into actions they don’t want to do, to walk on egg shells to keep him happy.

I stayed because there was no way in hell I would let him have custody of the kids. I stayed because for years, I believed I was worthless and that no man would ever want me. I was damaged goods. It took me years to get that thinking out of my brain. I am well educated. I have a great career. Abuse doesn’t care.

Abuse doesn’t infect any social status of people more than any other. Abuse infects the minds of women and children who are raised to believe it is the only way to live. Abused people believe they are worthless. Abused people don’t think they deserve any better.

On average it takes women 7-10 attempts to get out of that situation to follow through. Why? It is because they keep getting pulled back in with apologies, gifts. Grand gestures are made in front of children to make the woman look bad.

Example: the first time I said I wanted a divorce (years beforehand), he proposed to me again (with ring) in front of the children, promising things would be different. He gave me diamond earrings, too (he used the mortgage money to pay for them). I didn’t have the strength then to say no. The kids were counting on me to keep the family together. The kids were counting on me to protect them from him.

I failed more times than I care to count.

He came to my workplace once, after using my GPS location at a lawyer’s office, asked me in front of co-workers for a moment to speak to me, put me in his car and screamed at me for wanting a divorce. How dare I try to ruin our family!! I was allowed to leave the car, went back to my desk and cried. My officemate patted my shoulder and asked if I wanted to talk. I couldn’t. How could I let her know I was so badly abused by him and was terrified to leave?

Oh, he also hacked into my digital journal. Private thoughts were no longer private. They became tools to be used against me.

I thought I was strong enough to get out then. He beat me back down verbally, psychologically, financially, emotionally, sexually – yet he never broke the law. He had asked me for years for a divorce. Suddenly, following through with his wishes, I was bad – bad because I was actually pursuing it.

Last week, he used the ‘cancer card’ again, this time on our youngest children. The only thing they know of cancer was watching it slowly kill his dad years ago. It killed his mom, too. He told the kids that doctors thought he had cancer and that he was getting tested. He told them alone in the car, without even his girlfriend to even hear. Manipulative, conniving control freak. He played the pity card to keep them close. He didn’t care about what the news did to them. He only wants control. He demands loyalty.

Laws in this country, and many other countries, need to change. Why does it take a punch to the head to get the police to act? What kind of proof is needed for harassment via texting? I printed out the texts he sent to me at all hours of the night and brought them to the OPP. Nothing was done. Because nothing was done, he continued until I blocked his number. Email is now the only safe way to communicate. I have kept every one for the past 10 years. Plus, screen captures of texts.

Will it make a difference? I don’t know.

Getting a divorce is complicated. And expensive. My ex said he’d pay all court costs. Really? He’ll pay court costs but not child support?

The process is worse when you are divorcing a control freak who refuses to cooperate. He dropped out of mediation. He dropped out of counselling. He only wants divorce on his terms. That is not going to happen. I am levelling off this power struggle.

I don’t know what the future holds with the divorce. What I do know is that when the children are with me, they live in a home without fear, a home where they are trusted, a home where they can tell me whatever they want, even if it hurts my feelings. They can’t do the same with him.

They are the other victims of spousal abuse.

To be continued….

Information has been changed or deleted for fear of retribution.

Culture

Subliminal Advertising In McDonald’s Ad Ice Cubes

July 14, 2014 The Silo Leave a comment

I was sitting in the drive-thru at the McDonald’s on Rymal Road and Upper James St South in Hamilton a few nights ago and I found myself drawn towards a large advertisement set up on the wall between the two drive-thru windows. (see below) The ad wasn’t radical in any way- it showed some French fries, a pop and ice cubes and a Big Mac along with a few menu items in graphic type fonts.

I was a bit confounded because at first, I couldn’t understand what was drawing me into the advertisement- then I remembered a well worn paperback book I have called Media Sexploitation by Wilson Bryan Key, sitting on a book shelf somewhere back home. That book is all about subliminal advertising and its photo section showing examples of ‘hidden words and symbols found in ice cubes’ has stayed with me. So I studied the McDonald’s ad again, this time paying special attention to the ice cubes and that’s when I saw it: “Sex”.

We’ve copied and enhanced a portion of the advertisement to help illustrate where the word “SEX” can be found. The left side of the image is unaltered and ‘as found’- this ad was much larger than can be shown here in our post and the ice cubes were easier to “read”. CP

Did you know? Subliminal advertising is banned in the UK and Australia but is legal for use anywhere except television and radio in the USA and Canada.

I turned to my 15 year old son- (the reason for the McDonald’s visit in the first place was to buy him an after- Summer Hockey root beer) and asked him if he could see the words “Sex” in the ice cubes. It didn’t take long for him to get excited because he saw it immediately.

That’s when the drive-thru line was getting ready to move ahead and I jumped out of the car, grabbed my iPhone and took the photograph you see above.

McDonald’s says they do not subliminally advertise– (from http://brainz.org/10-devious-banned-subliminal-ads/ )

“On January 27 2007, viewers watching the Food Network’s Iron Chef America may have noticed a brief flash of red that appeared for a split second towards the end of a show when the challengers’ entries were being assessed and two men raised their glasses. What had audiences seen but barely been aware of – all but invisible to the naked eye? A McDonald’s logo that popped up for a single frame together with the hamburger giant’s slogan, ‘I’m lovin’ it.’ Following the revelation, accusations of subliminal advertising were met with claims that it was a “technical error” by the television network, but skeptics unsurprisingly weren’t convinced. How could such a thing occur accidentally? A McDonald’s spokesman said: “We don’t do subliminal advertising.” Sure, just an accidental glitch – a supersized one. ”

So you be the judge- these drive-thru advertisements are probably found in most Southern Ontario McDonald’s drive-thrus and you can take a look for yourself. We’d love to hear back from you on what you find. For the Silo, Jarrod Barker

Supplemental- Subliminal Advertising leaves its mark on the brain http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2007/03/070308121938.htm

Subliminal Advertising FAQ’s http://www.sublimads.com/faq.html

A Musical Journey for Brain Control~ CLICK ME

Thanksgiving, with its underlying message of gratitude, can help, not hinder, willpower around food.

Life sometimes can seem off kilter as responsibilities mount and people plow all their physical and mental resources into what seems to be the most pressing crisis of the moment.

“Personal power is the ability to achieve what you want,” according to Frederick Mann, a successful entrepreneur and author of The Economic Rape of America.

We can help harness and learn to use our personal power by understanding and working on our Emotional Intelligence (EI) skills.

The recently deceased don’t always ingratiate themselves with their survivors when it comes time to read the will.

And often ill feelings among family members can bubble to the surface when money is at stake.

Pankauski says any number of factors can lead to family feuds or general disgruntlement over an inheritance. Here are just a few:

Quantum physics is the physics of possibilities. Quantum physics says reality is both possibility and actuality.

The manifest (psychologists call it the conscious, spiritual traditions call it the immanent) is the domain of actualities that consciousness processes with awareness, with subject-object split.

It is self-evident that human creativity requires consciousness as a causal entity with free will, freedom to choose.

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