Tag Archives: illness

Living With Migraines- “The Invisible Illness”

Migraines Scanners
Screenshot from the 1981 Canadian sci-fi film Scanners directed by Canadian film maker David Cronenberg.

I am a chronic Migraine sufferer. Are you?

I was diagnosed when I was 18 and now in my 40’s I still get cluster migraines. Cluster Migraines are recurrent, severe headaches that usually stick to one side of the head, for me it’s the left. I’ve probably suffered from them since I was a very young child. Throughout my life, I have dealt with many hurtful comments from those unable to understand my affliction. Their comments used to really get under my skin. Migraines are very severe. They are not just a very bad headache. No two Migraine sufferers are the same when it comes to patterns of pain or management. To make matters worse Migraines are an ‘invisible illness’.

An invisible illness is something that the sufferer feels but no one else sees or acknowledges. Those that are afflicted with migraines are often accused of faking or imagining their disabilities.

But it’s not entirely hard to understand why- these disabilities are not always obvious to the onlooker and the cyclic nature of migraines means that they are a chronic disability that are never going to go away.

To suffer with migraines is to know not only physical pain but also at times, sociological pain and even ostracization. It’s when you’ve been motoring onward through life and everybody looks at you like you are a healthy person but in actuality, there’s that one thing that keeps you from being the person you see yourself to be. This compounds your mood and may even trigger that other “invisible illness”: Depression.

Yes, migraines come with a lot of misunderstandings from critics that refuse to believe what is happening.

My favorite line has always been: “You’re young, there is nothing wrong with you…”. It’s shameful! The idea of simplifying health into a debate about youth and middle or old age. You take the time to try to explain and inform people what your life is about and yet they still believe that your suffering is all in your head. That’s when I usually hear comments like- “Get outside and get some fresh air, that’ll fix it.” or ” You just need to get over it, move on with your life”. The worse thing for me to hear is ” If you’re that sick how come you are doing that?” The sad truth is that all these phrases come from people who can’t understand what it is like to deal with an invisible illness.

Migraines occur when the blood flows through the brain causing blood vessels to rapidly expand, which in turn causes pain and other symptoms.

For me, it all starts with an unbelievable pain that can persist anywhere from 24 to 72 hours. I refer to it as having a huge Mack truck stuffed inside my head. While this happens, symptoms include: vertigo, numbness, mass nausea, fainting, blurred vision, and sensitivities to light, sounds and smells. I have been told that many of these symptoms are very close to what one would feel if they were having a stroke. Sometimes these symptoms can occur without the associated pain. I look at those as ‘added extras’. They include bright sparkles in the sky that only I can see…an added extra.

When things are at their worse and I have tried taking all the suggested and prescribed medications such as aleve, and the pain just won’t go away I plop myself in a car and have somebody drive me to the hospital.

If you were me and had experienced this you may have ended up spending four hours at the hospital on a good night. When you were admitted they may have looked at you like you were a drug addict. They may have checked you for signs of a stroke at which point they may have placed you in a bed where you wait and wait and wait. You may have been hooked up to an IV with sodium solution to help rehydrate you. Then they may have started you on the meds.

For me it’s always been 2mg of Maxeran (anti-nausea medication for people who go through chemotherapy) and 5mg of Toradol ( a strong pain medication). Perhaps it’s that mixture that worked for you and you sat there and waited, maybe even had a snooze. The nurse observed when you started to feel better because the colour flowed back into your face and you became very hungry. At this point you are finally ready to go home and start all over again knowing that the next day will always be the best day.

Perhaps you are like me- I turn into a bit of an energizer bunny… with the pain removed and the symptoms gone I actually feel pretty healthy and am ready to face the world again.

But what triggers these attacks?

This is the hardest part. These horrid brain attacks can be caused by almost anything- physically exhausting yourself on one extreme or simply walking down the soap isle in the grocery store on another. Almost anything and everything can trigger a migraine for me. The weather for instance is a trigger that I have been stuck with for years. Before a storm, a build-up of barometric pressure can be an instant trigger. Flying on airplanes is a trigger due to the change in the atmosphere.

If you want simpler triggers how about MSG, Artificial Food Colourings, Caffeine, Red Wine or Preservatives? Even certain veggies tend to make the list. Other things that are triggers can be strong perfumes/soaps, too much stress, bright lights and loudness. Basically anything that could possibly cause a disturbance to my personal inner balance. It is consoling to know that not all of these are triggers for everyone who suffer with migraines. Somethings effect more people than others. Trying to maneuver between what does and what doesn’t trigger is a battle in itself.

This invisible illness leaves me helpless.

The idea that it can pop up at any point in time means there is no space for future time planning. Making plans in my life is non-existent. I can say I am going to go here or there but in the long run until I get up that morning I will never be sure. Then there are the times that I take the chance and go out because I am just so tired of my couch no matter how bad I feel. Other times I stay home and safe.

Few non-sufferers know that in certain places Migraines have been upgraded to a neurological disorder. Another fact that most people don’t know is that it will never go away. There is no cure only pacifiers that help you to deal with everything that transpires. Sometimes these pacifiers worsen the attack.

And the frequency of attacks?

I get them 15 days out of a month which doesn’t leave much time to actually live a carefree lifestyle. There are so many things that I and other sufferers have lost because of this illness. Jobs and career goals go right out the window. The simplest things like enjoying a movie at the theater, going to see a live band or even a family gathering are at risk. It has to be just right and on a good day. It’s very stressing trying to keep up. I haven’t even mentioned the troubles it creates within a personal relationship, between you and the significant other. Between everything you have to do and the things that you want to do. All this takes place within such limiting time frames. I almost feel grateful, to have dealt with them from such an early age because it has prepared me to deal with this kind of lifestyle. In a way it’s made me so much stronger then I ever thought I could be. I have learned how to look at life in a different way. Don’t get me wrong, I would give anything to live without them but because that is not an option…I will reluctantly settle for this.

This is a side of me that many people do not get to see.

It’s something that I have only shared with the most important people in my life. There is a huge stigma out there when it comes to diseases or conditions that go unseen. When I get an attack you wouldn’t know it, you can’t see it. You can’t see the numb and tingles that invade my body. A lot of people just do not understand nor do they really want to. In our fast paced society it gets lost. I am sharing my story because I would love to see the stigma removed. I want people to understand that just because someone seems healthy and able it doesn’t mean that they actually are.

All those comments that I pointed out at the beginning of this article are things that I have heard for years. I still deal with it to this day. People that I have had to deal with who never understood no matter how much you try to explain it. I know that other people have gone through the same things that I have and I want to let them know that they are not alone. I also want to let other people know that they need to think before making a judgment on somebody else. Keep in mind that old saying: “Do not assume or judge somebody until you have walked a mile in their shoes…” For the Silo, Dawn Bank.

Speedrunning (Beating Videogames Fast As Possible) Champs Playing For Make A Wish

For the first time this year, the European Speedrunner Assembly (ESA) is set to host their recurring speedrunning event, where gamers aim to conquer video games at record speeds and showcase mind-blowing talents.

For the first time ever, ESA is teaming up with Make-A-Wish International — an organization dedicated to fulfilling the wishes of children facing critical illnesses. Last year, ESA Winter and Summer collectively raised an impressive $200,000 for Alzheimer’s research. ESA Winter is taking place right now in Malmö until February 24th. 

Set in Malmö, Sweden, the event will revolve around gaming, entertainment, and interactive fundraising. An onsite global audience of several hundred attendees are already interacting, accompanied by a substantial online viewership exceeding two million. Both the onsite and online audience have the opportunity to actively support the charity, for example, by donating $25 to influence the course of the games or to support various shows and performances, such as a Ikea furniture building duel or rhythmic displays.

Last year, Make-A-Wish International granted more than 19,500 wishes to children living with critical illnesses around the world, including more than 5000 gaming and entertainment wishes. They are the second most popular type of wish granted by the charity, after travel wishes.

Ida Lidholt, one of the ESA organizers says: “We are delighted to announce our new partnership with Make-A-Wish International. ESA Winter is a festival where gamers and the community unite. Through video games and speed, we level up to raise funds for children living with critical illnesses. It is heart-wrenching to witness the struggles of these kids. If we can alleviate their burden even a little by helping them fulfil their wishes, it holds profound significance for us.”

Luciano Manzo, President & CEO, Make-A-Wish International says: “Children undergoing treatment for critical illness can experience anxiety, loss of hope, and isolation from friends and loved ones. For many of these children, gaming offers them a sense of escape, helps them connect with friends and distracts them from their long and often difficult treatment journeys. That’s why gaming and entertainment wishes are so popular among wish children. The funds raised from ESA Winter 2024 will help continue to grant these types of wishes and many others. We are so grateful to ESA and the gaming community for helping make wishes come true with this event.”

ESA is globally livestreamed on Twitch.tv/esamarathon. Viewers are urged to contribute during the broadcast, with opportunities to, for instance, name game characters, present challenges to players, or vie for fantastic prizes. By backing ESA and Make-A-Wish, everyone can play a role in fulfilling the wishes of children living with critical illnesses. Support the talented speedrunners and participate in the fundraising—tune in to ESA and make a donation!

Follow the event at www.twitch.tv/esamarathon

About ESA 

European Speedrunner Assembly (ESA) is a biannual charity marathon dedicated to video game speedrunning, held in Sweden. Since its inception in 2012, these events have collectively raised over one million dollars for various charitable causes.

The two main flagship events, ESA Winter and ESA Summer, occur annually in February and July, respectively, each spanning seven days. Beyond these, ESA also organizes smaller speedrunning gatherings such as ESA Legends, a five-day in-person event uniting top RPG speedrunners, and Break the Record: Live, a three-day competition aimed at breaking world records in specified games and categories.

About Make-A-Wish International

Make-A-Wish creates life-changing wishes for children with critical illnesses. Founded in 1980, Make-A-Wish is the world’s leading children’s wish-granting organization, having granted more than 585,000 wishes in 50 countries worldwide. Together with generous donors, supporters, staff and more than 27,000 volunteers around the globe, Make-A-Wish delivers hope and joy to children and their families when they need it most. Make-A-Wish aims to bring the power of wishing to every child living with a critical illness because wish experiences can help improve emotional and physical health. For more information about Make-A-Wish International, visit worldwish.org

Vision Quest Poetry Inspired By Spirit And Landscape Of Scotland

8bit Wendy E Slater Poet 2In her youth, Wendy E. Slater found her greatest gift of expression in poetry- and then went dormant. Years later, on a trip to Scotland, the fount reopened. She had been through a crucible of chronic illness that forever changed her, launching Slater on a quest for meaning and life reexamination. That quest opened a gateway into self-healing that resulted in 20 volumes of simmering, soul-searing and spiritual poetry that deftly points humankind toward a new awareness of our Oneness with all humanity, nature, the cosmos and the divinity.

Slater’s breathtaking dive into self-scouring, cleansing and finally transcendence offers hope for all who have been pulled down by the forces of self-blame, self-judgment and self-sabotage. The beauty of her soothing words and healing revelations clears the way for a new path to life-altering Unity, emerging from the alienation of separation.

Her awakening journey began first in the 1980’a where as a student studying science, she became increasingly aware of the inter-connectedness of all things. Struck down by an undiagnosed chronic illness in 1991 that incapacitated her for five years, she turned to alternative healing techniques when allopathic medicine failed her. This widely ranging exploration of holistic health and spiritual practices opened her eyes to a new way of being, brought forth consistently by healers from all societies and eras- an existence without “the false archetype of perfection.”

Says Slater, today a gifted alternative healer herself: “When blame and self-judgment are transformed, healed and cease to be, we have reawakened without myth, the mythos, of separation.”

Into The Hearth CoverIt was on that one heart-opening trip to Scotland in 2001, that the poetry coalescing inside of her during that healing period began to pour forth. In subsequent trips to spiritually enriched landscapes, the words found their way to paper. Slater calls her work “Vision Quest” Poetry.

Into the Hearth, Poems-Volume 14, is actually the first of her volumes to reach publication. And it is already a widely-acclaimed Amazon.com #1 Bestseller:

“This is a very dangerous book of songs. You will find yourself overwhelmed, engulfed, and swept away into the very intimate heart fire of Wendy Slater, the feminine heart fire of love, and in the end you will be left in ashes, totally in love without any object whatsoever, yearning for more.: ~ John A. Perks, Author of “The Mahasiddha and His Idiot Servant,” Ven. Seonaidh Perks, Celtic Buddhist lineage

“Wendy E. Slater is that breed of poets who open our eyes, our hearts, and our minds with a warm arm around the shoulder, a sympathetic and empathic delivery that instantly binds the reader to her. These poems, quite simply, are eloquent, not only because they are offered with a desire to invite us to join her on the path to enhanced perception of the world and our place in it, but also because she manages to infuse that sense of spiritual respect that is so often absent in contemporary poetry.” ~Grady Harp, Amazon’s Hall of Fame, a Top 100 Amazon reviewer.

In the Hearth by Wendy E. Slater is available from Amazon.com and also on Kindle. To learn more about “Vision Quest” Poetry visit Traduka.com

Take This Quiz And Get To Know Your Diseases

Cough. Cough. Sneeze. Sneeze. Here is a quiz from our friends at gapmedics.com entitled “Know Your Diseases?”, which takes a look at some modern-day ailments, showing symptoms and asking you to diagnose them! Do you think you can do it?

It’s fun and it might be harder than you think!