Tag Archives: heartbreak

How To Win At Dating In Your Twenties

Dating in your 20’s can be downright tough these days. A lot of times it’s all about “hooking up” or becoming “friends with benefits”, both which replace the notion of dating as a prelude to a long- term relationship or even saying “I do”. On paper, avoiding commitment seems like a good idea – remaining friends can protect you from the things that tear most couples apart – jealousy, cheating, heartbreak…but what happens when your ”hookup” becomes the one person you can’t live without? Set in the damp and drizzly neighborhoods of Portland, Oregon author Rebecca Kelley’s fun and quirky literary debut, Broken Homes and Gardens [Blake Slate Press] reveals what happens when you toe that fine line between friends and “more”.

Broken Homes & Gardens Book Cover

Not exactly on-again, off-again, Malcolm and Joanna are in-again, out-again: in love, out of each other’s arms, in an awkward co-living arrangement, out of the country. Their unconventional relationship is the only way, Joanna says, to protect herself from the specter of commitment, which inevitably leads to heartbreak. A When Harry Met Sally meets Portlandia for the Millennial generation, Broken Homes and Gardens is an ode to friendship, lust, and the unrelenting pull of love. It will appeal to readers who love romance, quirky humor, and stories that offer a deeper and sometimes darker look into the risks we take for love.

“Throughout literary history, romantic involvements for young women have been treated as a problem with an easy answer: find the right man, marry him,” says Rebecca,  “but I believe the period of early adulthood is not focused only on long-term coupling and knot tying. Many women I know – myself included – were involved in one or two long-term relationships in their 20’s. The struggles of dealing with their ending, and the aftermath, had an enormous impact on our development as women, and an even greater impact on future relationships.”

A contemporary tale full of wry humor, convincing dialogue, and emotional twists and tangles, Broken Homes and Gardens touches upon the following themes:

•     The often messy, complicated, confusing and passionate twenty-something love, both in literature and life
•     A unique look at the melting pot that is Portland, OR, known as the place where “young people go to retire”
•     The “Hookup” Culture: the troubles with 21st century dating and love
•     An honest look at “friends with benefits” – does it ever really work?
•     Broken homes – literally and figuratively

Oregon author Rebecca Kelley“My heroine in Broken Homes and Gardens undergoes some relationships in her late teens and early twenties that shake her belief in love so firmly that she decides marriage is not the answer to any of her problems,” adds Rebecca. “Joanna’s approach to her relationship with Malcolm isn’t optimistic but it’s rational. It’s understandable. And I think her story speaks to many of us.”

For the Silo, Erin MacDonald-Birnbaum.

It’s Break Up Season But Jewelry Helps Embark Your New Life

Break ups aren’t so bad when you treat yourself to a nice pair of diamond earrings.

There’s a reason Neil Sedaka’s “Breaking Up is Hard to Do” became a pop classic – because it’s true! But breakups can also be a time to reflect and embark on a new chapter in your life, says Jay Ryan.

“Many people have been through a romantic heartbreak, which  can be among life’s biggest challenges. But being single after a committed relationship can also be a good time to rejuvenate yourself,” says Ryan, co-founder of www.breakupgems.com, an online retailer specializing in breakup and divorce jewelry that “celebrates new beginnings.”

“We cater to the growing number of people looking for meaningful ways to bring closure to their past and move forward with confidence,” he says.

For those who’ve recently experienced a split, or are about to (December holidays is the time of the year most long term relationship break ups occur.) Ryan shares several ways to turn your breakup into a makeover — a “breakover.”

https://youtu.be/1GTFvlm0vGM

• Empower yourself with the gift of health. It’s almost a cliché that ‘exes’ lose weight after splitting up; some lose their appetite due to melancholy and some are motivated to look and feel better with exercise and dieting. Don’t punish yourself with spartan regimens, Ryan advises. Eat nutritious foods and train sensibly.

• Treat yourself to a new wardrobe. Clothing can be the bearers of painful reminders, like the sweater he or she got you last year. Consider freshening up your style with new clothes – hey, you’ll probably need them anyway with all that exercise. A new wardrobe can serve as a healthy reminder of the new you.

• Be proactive with your reading. There are many genres of self-help literature, from spiritual to academic. But don’t limit yourself to nonfiction; classic literature not only gives you a great education, it also helps readers increase empathy and better understand emotional complexity.

• Consider a healthy reminder of the new you. It’s a tradition in our society to commemorate a romantic union or celebration with jewelry. Your breakup may likewise be a blessing that allows you to grow as an individual. Consider a ring or other piece of jewelry that will not only mark this milestone but be a personal reminder of your transformation and new beginning.

• Travel adds perspective on a new journey. Whether or not you realize it, a breakup is the beginning of a new life trajectory. Travel – whether it’s time for a change of domestic scenery or a vacation – perfectly symbolizes a new journey. Overcoming a painful separation requires an outside perspective, which is often gained through travel.

• Invite friends over for a dinner party. The depression that is liable to ensue after a breakup often leads to isolation, but that is when you most need your friends! Why not host a breakup party? Rather than blowing it out with a large group of people, which may include strangers, keep it simple with intimate friends you can trust. For the Silo, Ginny Grimsley.

Jay Ryan is the co-founder of www.BreakupGems.com, an online retailer that specializes in fine breakup and divorce jewelry. Each piece in the collection conveys an empowering message of freedom and renewal with designs that are both stylish and meaningful for anyone overcoming a recent breakup or simply celebrating happy singlehood.